Peer Review by Emma_Caylie (United States)

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this past year

By: Luminescent


VERSE 1

Stared out my window
With a longing in my eyes
Never felt so alone
A call would've been nice
But it's better than dying in a hospital room by myself
That's why I'm grateful
To still have my good health

PRE-CHORUS

You should be too
Think of others rather than just you
You should try to
Have a different view

CHORUS

People are dying, other's are crying
'Cause this past year's been making them feel so
Helpless but you're just selfish

VERSE 2

Who cares 'bout your freedom
If it means saving a life?
You'll get back your freedom
You just gotta give it some time
It's better than dying in a hospital room by yourself
So you should be grateful you still have your good health

CHORUS

People are dying, other's are crying
'Cause this past year's been making them feel so
Helpless but you're just selfish
Why can't you just, why can't you just stay home oh-oh, oh-oh
It's better we all stay home mm-hm, mm-hm

BRIDGE

People hate being vulnerable
But this past year's been insufferable

CHORUS

While you're out drinking, others are grieving
'Cause people like you are out there spreading the virus, now they feel helpless
When will you learn, learn that life is precious?
Mm-hm, mm-hm
Learn that life is precious
Mm-hm, mm-hm
Learn that life is precious

A song I wrote to those who disregard life and safety. Stay safe!

Message to Readers

PLEASE REVIEW, COMMENT AND/OR LIKE!!!! Thx:)


Peer Review

This song really aligns with me. I definitely agree with the authors point of view and it was nice to hear someone say something.


The line that really stood out to me was “Never felt so alone. A call would have been nice but it’s better than dying in a hospital room by myself.” This is definitely something I have felt before. It was nice to see that I wasn’t alone.


I think the writer could add a little more to her bridge. I feel like there is real potential to make it a big, showstopper in the song.


This song I so good! I love the lyrics and the flow of it. It’s very relatable and I love how you don’t hold back. You say what needs to be said.


Reviewer Comments

Maybe fix some of your formatting. There are some things which I think could be switched around, added to or changed to help with flow. Check my comments for more detail.