useless :)

United States

hi!
idrk what i'm doing but
she/her
OFFICIALLY 14!! :D
pisces
just starting to write :)
est 1/22/21

Message from Writer

scribble chums with Starlitskies, em wilder, and remi'sgotinkstains
go check them out, they're amazing writers :)

"Kindred spirits are not so scarce as I used to think. It's splendid to find out there are so many of them in the world."- Anne Shirley
"Thank you for your consideration."- Katniss Everdeen
"Great, we're all bloody inspired."- Newt :(
“Books! And cleverness! There are more important things! — Friendship! And Bravery!”- Hermione Granger

ty guys for 60 followers!! i'm really grateful :)

have a great day everyone!

a sea of euphoria

January 29, 2021

FREE WRITING

14
i almost wish the waters in my mind could
be a crystalline portrayal of paradise, but
i could never hope for so much. the vast
sea of my doubt is rough and choppy. it recklessly
tosses my emotions around, and their anchors are
the only things keeping them clung
on to reality. it has snatched every
last grain of my confidence away, and
when the waves wash back in, i
only find vivid memories of my failure.
of course, fragments of self trust still
wait for me in the depths of my mind, like
hidden pearls in a murky ocean
of uncertainty. i could never hope
to retrieve them though. i am not
brave enough to venture into this sea
of the unknown, full of obstacles
which i have thoroughly convinced myself
i will never be good enough to face. there is no
sliver of hope to hold on to when the last
ember of the fire within me has been smothered.
doused out by the waters that have
washed away the person i could have been.
perhaps it is better this way. if i do
happen to stumble upon the grace
of a simple yes, if i have something to be
proud of, i am washed over with emotion, but
it is refreshing this time. the
sun beams down its rays of warmth
and the choppy ocean turns into the paradise
i have been desperately needing for so long. it is
only a moment though. the sun must set, and
cohesive with the blanket of darkness
that falls over the world, fear of the
unknown infiltrates my soul once more.
although i know that night will come, i
live for those brief moments, where my world
is sun-drenched in a euphoria of 
feeling worthy.
 
hi!
i got this idea because recently something happened that i'm actually pretty PrOuD oF mYsElF for, doesn't happen often but i was happy about it
that's where the inspiration for the ending came from anyway
thanks for reading :)

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  • January 29, 2021 - 11:24am (Now Viewing)

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30 Comments
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    re: yay i was hoping you would choose Bella Florence!!!!


    25 days ago
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    re: oooh i like bella waverly and bella paige!!! i still like bella florence the best tho ;)


    25 days ago
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    I thought of another one! do you like Bella Tallow???


    25 days ago
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    and i LOVE your anne quote so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


    25 days ago
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    re: i love helping you! don't worry! so, Bella Florence, Bella Hart, and Bella Skye. In my humble opinion I like Bella Florence and Bella Skye better than Bella Hart. I do really like Bella Florence . . . at least you only have 3 to choose from now!!! ;)


    25 days ago
  • em wilder

    "it has snatched every
    last grain of my confidence away, and
    when the waves wash back in, i
    only find vivid memories of my failure.
    of course, fragments of self trust still
    wait for me in the depths of my mind, like
    hidden pearls in a murky ocean
    of uncertainty"
    woah... the imagery here?! i love it so much! the format adds a lot and the last bit i think is my favorite part... beautiful and gives me such a warm feeling inside! glad you are proud of something you did, that's a great feeling to have. and your message board! scribble chums! that's great. thanks for supporting me, it means so much. i also love the anne quote! ha! what's your fav anne book? alright scribble chum, gotta be productive elsewhere. have a great day!
    <3<3<3


    25 days ago
  • anonymous_123

    Also I love the way that you made the format and the words are so beautiful:) it is so nice and contains so much imagery! Absolutely stunning just like you! :)


    25 days ago
  • anonymous_123

    You joined a week ago and you have 27 FOLLOWERS AHHH SO PROUD OF YOU JUST LIKE YOU SHOULD BE PROUD PF YOURSELF!!!! If you want, you don’t have to check it out but I writing a series until the end of February called A Better Me, it’s supposed to create a better you in a month and I have a little guide and this is not just me looking up things it is actually what I think and has helped me! Thought you liked it just because I want to show you that you are sooooooooooooo (times infinity) worth it!!!!! I BELIEVE in you!


    25 days ago
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    re: i like bella skye and bella hart!
    do you like Bella Florence?


    25 days ago
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    aaahhh . . . chums not chumbs what am i doing?


    25 days ago
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    re: starlitskies came up with a few ideas: inkoholics and quill pals? do you still like scribble chumbs best??


    25 days ago
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    re: bella eve sounds nice . . . surnames . . . kade?
    bella kade. bella kade. idk.
    hmm . . . Bella Rosebane? Bella Flaim? Bella Stone? Bella Lotus?
    I've always liked Bella Sophia
    Bella Bloodstone? Bella Starr?
    Sorry if these are all horrible . . . I'm not so great at coming up with names myself . . . you could be Bella Fern, tho that doesn't really flow . . .
    Bella is a hard name to find a good surname for. I would maybe look up online beautiful surnames that flow with the first name Bella . . . sorry if I was no help at all ;)


    25 days ago
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    re: totally . . . what are your ideas? so happy u want my opinion!!! (i guess that's what scribble chums do tho lol)


    26 days ago
  • AJ - Izzy

    the imagery of this gorgeous writing... thank you for the beautiful canvas you've painted in my mind :)
    re: thank you! very cheesy yes. I love it and cringe at it simultaneously XD


    26 days ago
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    re: yup, but sadly that's the way it goes lol


    26 days ago
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    re: thanks, useless! (it feels really weird calling you 'useless' lol)
    yeah, little things can make me so happy sometimes . . . like everything in the world is good and that's the way it's meant to be ;)


    26 days ago
  • cloudi

    re: eek thank you!!


    26 days ago
  • Lata.B

    This is amazing! Ok and the imagery tho...wow!
    Re- Oh gosh you have? That is just so sweet! Have a wonderful day!


    26 days ago
  • Coeur

    re: yeah no problem! Sorry if I overexplained I'm a bit of a nerd about this.


    26 days ago
  • Coeur

    another reply because I forgot: also thank you for your compliment!! it was really sweet and I appreciated it


    26 days ago
  • Coeur

    reply: That's exactly the definition of stream of consciousness! It's definition is "a literary style in which a character's thoughts, feelings, and reactions are depicted in a continuous flow uninterrupted by objective description or conventional dialogue" It's a term invented by William James in 1890 by William James, in his book "The Principles of Psychology" (I don't know how to italicize in WtW comments so I'm just putting in quotations, sorry.) It existed before that though, this was just the first time it had been given a name. A lot of authors write in it, but the only ones I'm familiar with are Edgar Allan Poe, Victoria Woolf, and apparently Stephen King! Gertrude Stein used it for poetry, I've read a few of them. It was popularized by the Modernist movement. That's really all I know though.


    26 days ago
  • Shivona

    YOU ARE SO TALENTED! this is a work of art, it makes me feel so much and the imagery is so vivid! amazing work
    PS Thank you for the comment and congratulations it means so much!! :)


    26 days ago
  • Coeur

    This is beautiful wording! The structure is interesting, were you going for stream of consciousness? If so I think you did great!!


    26 days ago
  • ~wildflower~

    Re: thank you so much for your lovely comment! Your support means a lot to me :).
    Also, hi! I haven’t come across your profile before and it’s nice to meet you! This piece is amazing!!! The imagery is superb and I love the way you’ve contrasted the ‘vast sea of doubt’ and ‘paradise’ so vividly. And did I just read in your profile that you’re just starting to write??!! You have some serious talent!! I’m so excited to read more of your writing!
    p.s. I love your profile picture! That is basically the epitome of comfort for me.


    26 days ago
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    re: alright, scribble chums it is!!!


    26 days ago
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    re: okay, basically, you, me, em wilder, and starlitskies are either going to be (choose which one) pen friends or bookworms together.


    26 days ago
  • em wilder

    currently have to pay attention in class (which almost never happens) but notes must be taken. i'll read this later! your comment made my day tho!


    26 days ago
  • Dragonfly

    wow, this is so well written! I love the many metaphors you use, it really enriches your you wonderful descriptions!
    Re: Thank you so much!!


    26 days ago
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    we could call ourselves:
    bookworms
    sisters
    pen friends
    ??? any ideas


    26 days ago
  • remi'sgotinkstains

    re: ok, useless, turns out we can't be "library buddies" because that's SunV's thing . . . so we have to come up with a different name for our group (do you mind if Starlitskies joins whatever we call it???). Any ideas for a group name???


    26 days ago