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♕ | she/her | est. 2018
summer hiatus coming soon.

Message from Writer

"perhaps one day / we will meet again / as characters in / a different story, / maybe we'll share / a lifetime then." ~pavana

best wishes & my heart are always sent your way.
i love you.


January 20, 2021



i'm fat,
           i bet you didn't know

sorrowful surgical slip-ups: swollen cheeks; bedridden scar tissue pillows
                                         scratched marks from spoiled poodles that
                                         screw you over, even if you're six years old
                                         & didn't mean ruined sleep.

makeup stain decorate whale plushies mailed
years ago, when you're best friend would've said: he loved you back
& knew they were your favorite.

                                                but          moving                
                                                means taking your heart away,
                                                hurting those to stay. irony,
                                                is cruel, when they forget,
                                                makes you bleed too.

stomach crawlഗ,
raised on thick
                          r              s
                             o       t
that you've starved away & oxygen scrapped lungs raw -
from midnight runs; eat healthier, doesn't mean stop eating;
yet, still twenty pounds lighter.

solitude induced attitude prICKs skin of high school somebodies:
                                                    parents were popular people,
                                                    they were pretty cool,
                                                                                      "back in the day".

l̶e̶g̶a̶c̶i̶e̶s̶ fictional stories for a shadow's belief and moUrnIng in frost room
on friday date-less nights while yells echo criticizing, disciplining, scolding,
for doing homework and creating walls

                                                            (you never put up).

meet somebody,                              somebody, not hEaRtBrOkEn at all.
                          f                        e
                            a                    s
                               l               o
.         l

therapy's an empty threat:
                                        first, poverty couldn't afford it,
                                        second, they're too scared of blunt results from it
                                        third, even if they found courage buried in acceptability,
                                                 rejection of stranger's talking wraps a cord around
                                                 your misshaped body; audacity says they'll prescribe the
                                                 this will make it okay pill, you'll pretend to take,
                                                 you've also preplanned running away.

endless streams,
                        you created
                                         the music industry.
"she's just looking for her angels / but they're a little hard to find" ~We Three


See History
  • January 20, 2021 - 1:03pm (Now Viewing)

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  • Livsnjutare

    This is beautiful and so sad! I love how you made the words, it was so cool!

    4 months ago
  • Cosmogyral

    You are only what you make yourself to be. Become your own strength.

    4 months ago
  • Paisley Blue

    oh wow, this... i don't know what to say other than this is the definition of a beautiful mess. wow. <3

    4 months ago
  • CDWillson

    sending love, D. i hope you know your friends love and accept you no matter how you might feel or what you might be going through. many shoulder pats for you!

    4 months ago
  • Anne Blackwood

    Wow, you sound gorgeous. So fierce-looking and (and yeah I know you've got some fierceness in your heart, too). Great piece. Makes ya think.

    4 months ago
  • Yellow Sweater

    Wow. I don't know what to say. Wow. The formatting... The bluntness... The surgical precision... Brilliant.

    4 months ago
  • Writing4Life

    Wow..........I can relate to this. I've had health issues for the past 4 years meaning I've had a lot of weight gain. Which I find really difficult. Countless diets, hours of exercise, and yet, no difference. I have a parasite (whoo) that means I literally can't lose weight. I don't think I've ever heard it described so beautifully tho :) Thank you for being so honest <3

    4 months ago
  • xx carolina xx's crazy how much I get this.

    4 months ago