crystalline•galaxies

Switzerland

tuffy
she/they
infp-a | 4w5

Message to Readers

describes my habit of staying up at night obsessing over writing, as well as my inability to let it go for one second even when it rips me from my life. it is like a siren.

siren song | a writer's fate

January 5, 2021

FREE WRITING

22
i was once a lone traveler, a small being on a large ship in a large ocean.
if i looked into the water, all i could see was my own pale face staring back up at me,
and if a tear caused a ripple that distorted the image,
nobody was around to care.
it might have been enjoyable,
being the master of my own ship;
but all i found was nothing --
not even a seagull passed by my mast.
the ache inside me grew.

it was early on a misty, foggy morning,
when i heard it for the first time.
it sounded of candy floss and dreams,
of silk and passion,
of parchment and intelligence.
i don’t know what came over me --
my mind was fuzzy and blank --
but the next thing i knew,
i was in the water,
eyes full of blur and nose full of salt and mouth full of anything but air.
my ears were still full of the sound.

i felt her fingers on my wrist as she pulled me from the depths,
and though i was too tired to pry open my eyes,
i knew i was safe in her soft, rose-scented arms.
she spoke gentle words in my ear,
ones i cannot repeat.
she rocked me into a trance,
and i lost myself.
i awoke in white satin,
eyes heavy and head aching and tongue tasting of blood.
but then i saw her, and i lost sight of my body.
she was beautiful and ugly and sweet and dangerous and lilac and ruby red.
when she leaned in and ran a hand through my hair, i forgot my name.
i would never remember it again.

it was lovely, the time we spent together.
during the day, i would wander around the island,
in awe of the lines on the trees,
the stanzas in the sand,
the verses engrained on the leaves.
if i wished, i could sit upon the stone patio secured by elaborate pillars;
or i could bathe in the pools that sparkled with life;
or i could eat the figs and grapes and pomegranates that grew in the garden;
or i could even watch her as she worked,
her entrancing voice humming low in her throat as she wrote.
sometimes, she would even show me her pieces,
telling me this and this and this,
unlocking the mysteries of the universe and letting me in.
during the night,
the darkness was filled with whispered voices and delicious caresses,
curses and murmurs and sweaty satin sheets,
and sometimes she would remind me of my name,
carrying it to me on silent sighs 
only to have it evaporate from my mind once more.
i never learned her name, but i did not wish to;
to me, she was Everything and Nothing,
All and Aught,
Lot and Nix. 
she was Her.

time went on, and seasons changed;
spring-to-summer-to-autumn-to-winter,
each one bringing new ideas and new experiences and new pastimes.
it was a journey of discovery,
and she was pleased to teach me,
to take me under her care and let me grow,
stern and strict during the day but rewarding during the night.
i found that i wanted nothing to do with who i previously was,
or the life of bobbing aimlessly on the sea of being that i had once led,
and i shoved all of it into the trunk i kept under our the pallet we shared,
hoping to never surface it again.
i lived instead in this world of ours,
cutting out everything i had once known and everyone who once knew me,
never missing it for a second. 
they couldn’t find me here, anyway.

i don’t remember the exact moment i realized what had happened to me.
or maybe there wasn’t an exact moment;
maybe it just happened gradually.
either way, i began to realize who i was becoming;
i looked into the ocean’s reflection, and instead of the lost, innocent, excited young girl i saw on the ship,
i saw a wild-haired, craze-faced adolescent with dark circles under her bloodshot eyes.
i should’ve been scared;
i should’ve run away and tried to fix myself,
cried out to the heavens and prayed for divine intervention,
written sos out on the sand and shouted for sailors to hear me;
but instead i laughed and threw a pebble into the water,
erasing the image of my face.
i walked back to the palace,
and instead of resting my weary eyes,
i lost myself in her lips once more.
they tasted like lavender.
inspired by r.j.elsewhere's piece and the prompt that went along with it.

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  • January 5, 2021 - 6:02pm (Now Viewing)

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15 Comments
  • mirkat

    re: since you asked about books... dig by a.s. king is what i'm reading right now and fhudijsoa my mind is blown! it's about these 5 cousins and it's kinda crazy how the story connects them to each other... there's the shoveler and malcolm and canihelpyou? and freak and loretta and each one has their own problems and personalities and they are all connected. the writing is just amazing. only half way through and i don't think i took a breath since i cracked open the cover... so yeah, check that one out! also just finished we were liars by e lockhart and that was something too! the plot twist... don't even get me started i was crying for hours it seemed like and it's kinda prose. then the poet x by elizabeth acevedo is actually told in verse and took my breath and then some. i still have no words. deals with so many things and is just so impactful. alright that was a lot of books but i think u'll enjoy all of them! any recs for me? always looking for a new book to read. good night, good morning, good afternoon!
    <3<3<3


    4 months ago
  • Wisp

    Replying: Ahh sweetie, dearie, hon!! I'm so happy you liked it, and I hope my love and appreciation for you has gotten through!


    4 months ago
  • mirkat

    okay couldn't help myself had to read this again... still in awe, you know? everything i said in my last comment still stands true. somehow this is even better the second time around!?
    re: thank you for your wonderful comments! make me so happy! glad you are doing okay... there's so much going on in the world right now and it can get overhwleming. i'm good, too. have a couple books i'm excited to start reading. same old same old for me. and i'm reading wisp's tribute/january gifting poem for you and it just took my breath away. i wanna copy and paste it in this comment but decided against it! XD i feel the exact same. you add so much to this community. alright, stay safe and keep writing. i appreciate and look up to you more than you could know.
    <3<3<3


    4 months ago
  • Wisp

    Replying: Of course! Oh so that's what that was! I came on briefly and I saw your profile picture was the default eye thing that WtW has, and then the next moment I checked you had a different profile picture haha.


    4 months ago
  • a rose

    Obsessed with this babe


    4 months ago
  • Just_A_Memory

    The freaking imagery is just *chef's kiss!* There's hardly any words to fit this!


    4 months ago
  • Wisp

    "i was in the water,
    eyes full of blur and nose full of salt and mouth full of anything but air."
    Where do I even begin with this? Your imagery, the personification, the metaphors, the diction, all of it is just so deliciously extravagant that it has this air of insatiability that comes with it--as if no matter how much you read it, you'll always be craving more and more. Every bit of this is deviously concocted into such a masterpiece, every single space, line, punctuation, every single dot of ink on the screen reeks of beauty. I love this in all its entirety, how you've explained the relationship between you and your personification of writing. It's all beautifully told, while still holding this raw element. Especially with the ending, gosh those that hit hard. Because as writers, we get so caught up with our muses sometimes, that we forget about ourselves along the way. And you showed that in such a raw and telling way. It's all brilliant, absolutely breathtaking.
    Replying: Aw thank you! Yeah, I just wanted to change it up a bit, new year and all haha. And I absolutely adore yours as well! You always have a knack for picking some brilliant profile pictures.


    4 months ago
  • Rohan’s Defender (Semi-Active)

    Wow. Just wow.
    Re: thank you so much!!! :) :)


    4 months ago
  • Anne Blackwood

    Yes. Everything that has been said and more. Your writing is a masterpiece.


    4 months ago
  • AJ - Izzy

    i... i... words. what are words, this is... stunning. stunning. ah, i am in love, absolutely absolutely BEAUTIFUL, this is true beauty in writing. idk what to say, you are so so incredibly talented with words.
    have a wonderful wonderful day, and never stop writing because, wow, the world would lose one of the brightest stars out there <3 <3 <3


    4 months ago
  • R.j.Elsewhere

    I am completely and utterly speechless. This piece...it’s been touched by the heavens. I don’t know how else to describe how gorgeously euphoric this is. Your use of extended metaphors and control of language itself could rival that of time’s greatest writers. I, too, could not find a single line which captivated me wholly as it was the entirety of the piece which bewitched me so that the thought of only adoring one line feels akin to adultery...It was righteously raw. But in the sense where you don’t see how truly horrific the existence of a writer is until the very end, and the lure you have experienced, aside with a false sense of security that this work is something of sweet nature and romance with the supernatural, has been shattered by words that could seduce archangels. Waking up to this was truly a gift in itself. You have stolen all my thoughts and ability to function normally with this one piece. I am forever grateful that you drew from my simple prompt when making such a masterpiece. Thank you


    4 months ago
  • rwong

    argghhh this is so beautifull and all the metaphors and asldk;fjals;dfkjas;lkfj and i honestly dont know what to say, so you might want to just reread mirkat's comments, but like seriously you're such a talented writer <3 <3


    4 months ago
  • Paisley Blue

    gah just realized i forgot to respond to your earlier comment on "amen..."!!!
    RE: awww so glad my comment made you happy :) jsflerihgleiruy excuse my keyboard smash, i'm blushing so hard rn - you talked about me?!? ahh i'm honored to be your inspiration!!!!!! :D love you!!!!


    4 months ago
  • Paisley Blue

    ...

    just read mirkat's comment. she said it all ;)


    4 months ago
  • mirkat

    i... wow.... okay i have so much to say but i feel like i lost myself in between the lines. your lines. this is beautiful and fully describes what writing is and insomnia and all that you should care about but don't and i love this beyond belief.... i literally cannot will not choose a favorite line because i can't... my favorite parts i liked where you described the emptiness and then the sound the sound.... and then what the island's like and all you can do there and the metaphors you've created are just beyond... okay well sometimes punctuation fails me when i'm in awe so please ignore me and that.
    re: you left me comments and i read them and then i forgot about them and then i went on hiatus and now here i am.... so! thank you for your comments. thank you for replying to my embarrassingly long comment. thank you for reading my pieces. just thanks for everything, you know? you are always so kind and thoughtful and an AMAZINGGG writer and i'm always here whenever whereeverrrr but i know you know that.... sooooooo goodbye for now, until we meet again. oh and how is your 2021 going?
    <3<3<3<3


    4 months ago