Stone of Jade

United States

~ 17 she/her ~
Aspiring writer and artist. Completely awestruck by night skies. Apart of many, many fandoms ;) Reader, journaler, collector.
~ pilot pens and beat-up notebooks ~
one half of the locket
discord LexLuthor#8769

Message to Readers

This was super fun to write. I may publish a part 2 if i have any other fun interactions at work XD

what did you think? would you want to read more? do you guys have any fun work stories?

one more from me: i am realizing i have a "customer voice" now. when I am greeter i gotta sound friendly (thank goodness my mask is hiding my tired/fake smile towards the end of the day). I realized my "fake" customer voice was a thing when i met a new guy at my sister's school and promptly greeted him with: "Hi! How are you today?!" followed by a major cringe.

also it's always fun when I greet someone with "have a nice day" or say "good morning" to those who are leaving...in the afternoon *facepalm*

all joking aside tho, i meet a lot of super friendly people. so many are so sweet and nice. I am really blessed that my first job is in a place super friendly and welcoming--and safe too.

anyways, thanks for reading and have a great night (or day)!!

snippets from my shift at the grocery store

December 30, 2020

FREE WRITING

17
I work as a courtesy clerk at a grocery store. It is a super fun and sometimes tiring job. Basically I am a glorified janitor, cleaning bathrooms, sanitizing carts (thanks covid), run around helping the cashiers, and putting stuff away. And then the all time fav: helping customers. Some of my interactions make me laugh, other's i just kinda want to rant about. I have finally collected enough (okay--a few) that I wanted to share with you guys. 

(me)
*my thoughts*
"the lovely customer"

-----
INTERACTION #1 - the Im-looking-for-this-but-i-haven't-actually-checked-the-shelves-yet lady

"Do you work here?"

*me, wearing a bright red Haggen t-shirt* 
(yes, I do.)

"Can you tell me where the rice is?"

*only hearing half of what they said bc this is an old lady muffled by a mask* 
(I'm sorry, what?)

"Rice--R-I-C-E"

*yeah, I know how to spell rice*
(Have you tried aisle 3?)

"Well, I wanted to ask first."

*okay--yeah I guess I understand that reasoning*
(My best guess is either in aisle 3 or 4. Probably at the bottom of the shelf, but I am not sure)

the old lady then huffs and mumbles something--I'm assuming by the uncertainty of my answer--while turning around.

*leaving me left thinking how it is impossible for me to know where a certain rice is in the whole store*

-----
INTERACTION #2 - im-sorry-how-old-do-I-look?

me, cutting through the alcohol section as a short-cut to the back

"Hi, do you have any suggestions for a beer that is --rattles off ingredients and other specifications I have never heard of"

(Oh, uhh--catches me off guard--I'm sixteen, so I can't help you, cause, I don't drink beer.)
*and have NO idea what you are talking about*

-----
INTERACTION #3 - okay-this-one-hurt-a-little

this time it is my coworker:

*me, pulling my mask down a bit (outside--don't freak out) to call across the cart area*
(Hey, can we push these carts up?)

"Wow--you look a LOT younger with your mask off"

*okay, ouch--i don't know how to take that*

-----
INTERACTION #4 - mr. i-need-a-specific-brand-of-pot-stickers-you-should-know-where-they-are

"Do you work here?"

*me, wondering if our bright red t-shirts aren't bright enough*
(Yes, sir, I do. Anything I can help with?)

"I am looking for Fancy Cuisine Pot-stickers. But I can't find them."

*by this time i already no I have NO idea where this oddly specific brand of pot stickers are*
(Would you like me to help you look for them?)

Says kind of rudely: "Well, I wouldn't have approached you if I didn't."

*Alrighty--goes and walks soooo slowly with the guy up the aisle*

"Oh, here they are!" reaches for a bag

(Sir, that is orange chicken.)

"Well I know that.." puts bag back and picks up the right bag of pot stickers

*I ended up leaving in a very confused state*

-----
INTERACTION #5 - mrs. no-one-reads-the-signs

background first: at the store we have an entrance door and an exit. However, it is confusing bc the entrance is on the left, not the usual right side. (it is bc the carts are on the left so it prevents cross traffic.) A lot of people dont read the signs and go thru the wrong door but I can't say anything. Well, I was a greeter--meaning i stood at the door for six hours washing the carts--and this is where our scene begins. *enter customer*

"Well I guess people just can't READ aNyMorE!" lady throws exasperated hands into the air as a sweet old lady exits thru the wrong door.

*I shrug bc I cant say anything*

BUT THEN! the lady proceeds to huff and puff and--here's the kicker--enter through the wrong door.

*Leaving me confused, dazed, and trying not to laugh out loud at the hypocritical irony I just witnessed*

-----
INTERACTION #6 - this one is my favorite

*me, walking down the aisle with a go back. I see an old couple, the lady with the cart, the man on one of the riding carts. Old man isn't wearing a mask but I assume he has a medical condition--I can't say anything anyways bc that is manager's job. I smile and keep walking*

then i hear:

"Mary, guess what? I wasn't wearing my mask!" 

"GeOrge!!"

but the old lady said it in such an exasperated yet kind way--it srsly was so sweet <3

-----
INTERACTION #7 - the-little-rodent-problem

this is my manager:
"I need your help cleaning up this display case."

(Oh, what happened?) *see's bulging tile above with a hole* (water-damage?)

"Not really...a lady said they saw a rat chewing through the ceiling."

(oh)
*OH IS RIGHT! A RAT?!*

we proceed to clean it up with frequent glances to the ceiling above our heads

"I just don't want it to fall on my head."

*great...now i have that picture in my mind*

"I would probably scream."

(yea, me too)

*can't stop thinking of that scene from ratatouille when the ceiling falls revealing the PILE of rats*

update: they found a nest up in the ceiling. however, the rat is still MIA.

-----

It is always so sweet to see young guys buying flowers for (i assume) their dates. There was also this one super sweet old guy who talked with me and said he was buying some for his wife's bday. But last night I saw the sweetest picture. It was a man, wearing combat/armed forces pants, carrying a bouquet of flowers and a balloon that said "happy anniversary." asdfghjkl it just melted my heart.

 

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  • December 30, 2020 - 5:51pm (Now Viewing)

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17 Comments
  • V-Rose

    This was so awesome and funny! I've had a few strange/funny things happen where I work, but these were awesome! I love George! He sounds like a positively adorable old man!


    3 months ago
  • In Which Yaya Writes

    BAHAHAHAHAHA!! Literally LOLing here in my living room. My mom was like "What are you making that face for?" and I was like, "Uh, I'm smiling." But seriously, this is hilarious. I would work there just for that. That last one is SO SWEET! Ahhhhh. And I totally get that greeter voice! Whenever I'm at church I do that XD. Anyway, thank you so much for sharing this with us XD.
    Replying: Thanks so much! I thought the name was really pretty (it also means strong and feminine fighter) but everyone keeps thinking I'm saying "Evan." *sighs* If you read it it's better XD.


    4 months ago
  • The Ravenclaw Dragon

    Ha! Ha! Ha! These are quite funny! One of my pet peeves is when people are hypocrites, so I doubt I could handle your job without burning their eyes off. Keep on writing!


    4 months ago
  • ~ carolina ~ {formerly rosi willard}

    omg.
    that potstickers guy was just..ew.
    sorry you had to deal with that. people can be criminally stupid, y'know.


    4 months ago
  • anemoia by a thread

    LOVED IT
    the sweetness, the humor, the way people just are
    the irony of that one lady hahahaha


    4 months ago
  • Rachaelgrace

    ahhhh i love all of these. the first one was so funny XD
    re: ugh yess! i’m always texting or doing homework from a different class or literally watching youtube videos. its always so bad when one of my teachers calls on me and i have to unmute but have no clue what’s going on haha.


    4 months ago
  • Rohan’s Defender (Semi-Active)

    Hahahaha, this is great!!!!! These are nice ones!! I liked the Mary and George one! XD


    5 months ago
  • happy butterfly

    haha i love this! i especially loved the mary and geaorge one lol they're so cute


    5 months ago
  • sci-Fi

    this is literally the only time i have ever thought "heh, it would be fun to work at Target..."
    this is hillarious thank u XD


    5 months ago
  • Karma’s_Coming

    Ignore that comment then.. oops.


    5 months ago
  • Karma’s_Coming

    re: yeah, of course! You can either search my username and tag and send a request and I’ll give you the link, or you can give me your info and I can do it that way. Either way works.


    5 months ago
  • SunV

    These are hilarious and heartwarming at the same time. I could close my eyes and practically imagine the scene with George who didn't wear his mask.


    5 months ago
  • AstroWriter

    HiLarIoUs! I loved it. "Mary, I thought this was pretty funny"


    5 months ago
  • Anne Blackwood

    This is great! Lol I have a customer service voice too.


    5 months ago
  • Paisley Blue

    Pfffff this is too amazing!! Dude I honestly love people... lol that sounds weird but everyone is so funny and especially old people just make me crack up in the best ways XD this is so cute! Sounds like a pretty fun job :)


    5 months ago
  • ~madeline~

    This is hilarious!! I started a series with these kind of interactions from my job lol


    5 months ago
  • (sk)eyesofocher

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAI LOVE THIS


    5 months ago