Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
Message to Readers
I’m looking for some feedback on this one as I’m thinking of doing some further edits - anything at all would be helpful! Is the ending ok?
I love the wonderful similes and metaphors that shape this poem and convey your message so clearly. And your word choice is amazing - this piece is just so satisfying to read. I had to reread it more than a few times to feel like I fully absorbed its amazingness.
I think the line "and savoured congratulations for nothing at all" could be expanded upon. How do the complex souls savour them? And why are their actions nothing at all?
This poem is just. so. good. The imagery and diction and just everything is perfection. Feel free to ignore any of my suggestions; they're just suggestions. :) Amazing piece!!
Also this is completely unrelated but while reviewing this, I realized that the word business is like the word busy, but with ness. Like happiness. How did I not notice that before??? My mind is completely blown. XD