tas (yellowbrickrd)


Toto, I've a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore.
-the wizard of oz


Message to Readers

no editing, just hope, helplessness and worry.


November 25, 2020


I hate big decisions
Because either way you’ll have regrets
Like old, over-steeped tea from the night before,
Soured with time
What if?
I could have?

Which ever road I choose
People will be disappointed
Two schools.
Both think I am attending them next year.
But of course I can only attend one. 

One, all girls, huge, with some of the best friends I’ve ever made
The other small, creative, you don’t need close friends when everyone is friends.
One, where I will be challenged without trying and I will be pushed to my limits,
Another, where I will develop softer skills. Communication and connection.

One, where the challenge is mental.
One, where the challenge is emotional.
Two options, as different as can be.
Two different girls will emerge,
which one is me,
which one do I want to be?
true story.
changed from a nice, little poetic meltdown to a desperate pros and cons list.


See History
  • November 25, 2020 - 1:00am (Now Viewing)

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  • lochnessie

    re: ...

    10 months ago
  • Anne Blackwood

    This is more relatable to me than it really should be. Like even the details hehehehe... Try to choose which option will feed your soul, whether that's emotional or logical. Anyway, you write so well and not enough people appreciate it.

    10 months ago
  • Lata.B

    Omg that is such a hard decision! I wish you the best of luck!!

    10 months ago
  • lochnessie

    re: eeeep idk if i should say this stuff online though, lol

    10 months ago
  • Starlitskies

    Same! I absolutely hate big decisions! Last year, I had to choose between the math and bio science streams at school. The stream in which you study determines what occupations you can pursue in the future. I had a complete meltdown and it took me so loooooong to decide. In the end I chose bio science but I sometimes wonder what it would be like if I hadn't. Sorry, I'm talking about myself so much. Anyways I wish you luck!
    P.S. - I love the simile you used in the first stanza <3

    10 months ago
  • lochnessie

    woahh tough decision!! i made a similar one last year. good luck!! imagine if we were at the same school that would be so unlikely but so weird

    10 months ago