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any pronouns
infp-a | 4w5

Message to Readers

it's only been a day of being quarantined in my bedroom due to covid symptoms, and i'm already writing angsty poetry. by day three i think i shall be in a smoldering heap on the floor.

and i'll just listen to the same song over and over again to distract me from the fear that surrounds my lonely bedroom.

November 23, 2020


it plays over and over again / invading my ears / i can't hear anything else anymore / you'd think i'm sick of it / but no / what else am i to do when my life is shattering like a wine glass dropped onto a paint-stained basement floor?

the clock ticks down / a bomb about to explode / what it counts down to / i do not know / and i'd rather not find out, really / so instead i'll just sit here / and look at the hourglass printed on the cover of this book / it represents the time left in a person's life before they die / and i suppose it's relevant enough.

seven minutes and two seconds / how many of those can i fit in a single hour / i'm beginning to find out / it's almost dreamlike, isn't it / it drowns out the hushed voices from next door / i wonder what they're talking about / i'm assuming it's me / playing the possible outcomes out like a story formed in the air.

loathe the way they light candles in rome / but love the sweet air of the votives / the definition of votive: "an object offered in fulfillment of a vow, such as a candle used as a vigil light" / hurt and grieve but don't suffer alone / engage with the pain as a motive / but to be alone is to suffer, so how does one reject suffering alone?

i suppose it isn't all that bad / pity parties are comforting, but don't provide lasting relief / it's a waiting game now / i'll try to distract myself and not think about it / block it out with barricades and bricks / but will it be enough?
the lyrics in italics are from Gang of Youth's song, "Achilles Come Down," which i have been listening to on repeat for days.


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  • November 23, 2020 - 5:14am (Now Viewing)

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  • Wisp

    Replying: Oh my goodness! I can't imagine the relief you feel! Being sick already is dreadful, but on top of time suffering from a deadly virus? I just cannot imagine. I'm so happy that you're not positive, and I hope you savor your freedom!

    10 months ago
  • SunV

    Firstly: Amazing writing! I love the emotion you've poured out into this, it's like I'm reading your heart (Does that sound creepy? Idk...).

    Secondly: Awwww! How're you feeling now? I hope you get better soon, and that it's just symptoms, and not actually COVID. If it is, well I know you're strong enough to FIGHT IT

    Thirdly: I haven't really talked to you much. Would you like to lessen your boredom by reading my incomprehensible ramblings, and I shall do the same for your, comprehensible ones?

    10 months ago
  • rwong

    aw well i'm so sorry you're not feeling well! but uh also not really (*blushes because i feel bad*) cause this is amazing and if I can read more of this i mean like honestly i'd be blown away. as if i'm not already. anyway, all the best and i hope you'll feel better soon! <3 <3

    10 months ago
  • Wisp

    Replying: Oh thank goodness. I wish I could offer you more support, but alas a separation by screens only allows so much, so for now all I have are my words to offer you. Wishing you the best crystalline :)

    10 months ago
  • Wisp

    crystalline•galaxies's angsty poetry? Uh- Sign me up.
    But in all seriousness, you're suffering from COVID symptoms? Oh goodness, I hope you are alright and doing well. With cold and flu season here too, it's even more scary to go out. (And forgive me, but it's just symptoms not COVID itself correct? I'll keep you in my prayers dear).
    And this piece, ever so lovely crystalline•galaxies. I love the movement within the piece, from the intertwinement of lyrics and raw emotions tinged with that basis of fear. It flows so nicely and it's just beauteous. Also, I'm listening to the song right now (it's amazing by the way) and reading this piece again just hits so different. Maybe it's being able to discover the inspiration from the author themself, or maybe it's the pain and rawness in the singer's voice, but gosh it's so impactful and every word just drips with a conviction of a sort. Truly transcending, and I have no words for this masterpiece.

    10 months ago
  • Huba Huba

    Awwh thank you so much for your compliments! And I absolutely love that name Tuffy, it's soooo cute.
    And I'm a huge fan of Calvin and Hobbes, along with some childhood cartoons such as Winnie the Pooh. So, that explains my profile picture.

    10 months ago
  • pyrrhic

    i'm sorry you're not feeling great, but not too sorry because i got to read this amazing piece. also I LOVE THAT SONG SO MUCH. Paisley Blue mentioned her friends mentioning it a 'few' times... yeah, that's me begging everyone to listen to it. i can't get enough. beautiful poem <33

    10 months ago
  • Anne Blackwood

    Wow, Tuffy, this is really good. I'm so sorry you're sick though. I hope and pray that it's just a bug. Well, I suppose that if you're feeling yucky and lonely, the silver lining is great writing coming from it. *sending warm thoughts*

    10 months ago
  • Paisley Blue

    re: oh ok thx :)) its on my list!

    10 months ago
  • Paisley Blue

    Re: okay, that should be fine... what topics? Also, thank you for all of your support, it means so much to me <3

    10 months ago
  • ghostyboi

    Omgg that song is so good! Its at the top of my playlist lol

    10 months ago
  • ava09 (sorta back)

    relatableeee on the song front anyway haha - i hope you aren't sick lovey but if you are i hope you get better real soon!! sending loads of hugs - you got this!!! and i'm always here if you need to talk or it gets rough or anything. <3 <3 <3

    10 months ago
  • Paisley Blue

    Ughhhhh I so get this. Also, if THIS is what you write when you're trapped in your room—dude I'm jealous. My poems become incoherent rambles as soon as I'm left to myself for too long.
    I've heard a few friends mention that song, think im gonna listen to it now

    10 months ago