“exonerate yourself from your own choice, and you will be happy.”
“how could i be happy, knowing that so many things are beyond my control?”
“you will be happy knowing that you were destined to succeed, or you had no choice but to fail.”
“could i never be happy knowing that my own decisions led up to this ending?”
“then you have no one to blame but yourself, and you will either be happy in its conclusion or unhappy in its tragedy.”
“surely, one without choice is also a tragedy?”
“yes, but it is the better one nonetheless, for one knows that others have failed them, and the other knows that they have failed themselves.”
“then is it not obscuring the entire truth to transcend choice? in a game of poker, do we protest the cards that we are dealt or do we do the best with what we have?”
“the latter of course.”
“and what do i do if i am dealt extremely good cards? could i really find the same happiness in winning if my odds were greater?”
“of course not.”
“but i won anyways, out of my own choices. those who squander what they are given are still as tragic as those who never given those things in the first place.”
“but one is a fool, and another is a simply a victim of bad luck.”
“of course. but what of someone dealt a bad hand managing to become the winner versus someone who had a good hand who won, who would you congratulate more?”
“the person dealt with the worse hand of course.”
“but would you agree that out of their own decision making they managed to win despite the odds? wouldn’t that be sweeter than the person with a good hand winning?”
“of course. but wouldn’t being the fool that lost be even more sorrowful than the bad lucked person that lost?”
“of course, but that person has no one to blame but themselves while the other has the whole world to blame.”
“is it not agreed that the former is much heavier than the latter?”
“yes, but perhaps if the fool learned his lesson, then he’d be rising up soon again.”
“and if he doesn’t?”
“it’d be much better to have the possibility of winning than to forever resign yourself to losing.”
“and of the card dealer, if he purposely deals the cards badly?”
“then it is the card dealer’s fault, not the game’s fault. the people playing a table over may not have this problem at all.”
“and if there are multiple corrupt card dealers then?”
“then of course there is a problem, but not every person that has a bad hand was dealt one by a corrupt card dealer.”
“i said nothing of the sorts, just that the card dealer shouldn’t be dealing cards anymore.”
“of course, but was it not the card dealer themselves that chose to deal those cards and not anyone else’s nor the game’s fault, not even the person that received the better cards?”
“maybe it is the game’s rules themselves that makes it so hard for someone with a bad hand to win. therefore, the game itself is at fault.”
“is it though? the rules do not dictate the winners, only the ones who are playing and the cards they are dealt. there will always be winners and losers, and although someone might have the better hand than the other, there is nothing they can do about it. the best they can do is try.”
“but would it not be better for an equal chance for everyone to be a winner? for the cards to be dealt equally?”
"if there are only fifty-two cards then some people have to be dealt worse cards than others. this is not only the rule of the game, but it is a rule of nature."
"that doesn't answer my question. if this is the way nature works, i say we should do away with it."
"but isn't that unfair? say we did make everything equal, the formerly disadvantaged playing with the formerly advantaged. one could clearly say which group had suffered more."
"there there is no choice but to deal the cards unfairly again but in the other direction?"
[and we met at the brightest building in the city, and we ordered two cups each of hard whiskey on the rocks. he drank and he leaned towards me, eyes focused on mine. i stared back, and it seems the world disappeared from around us, as my whole focus was on him. he said—]
last resort. i promise my dust jacket's coming soon. this is unedited and i dunno what this is either to be honest. i wrote this before i saw the prompt but reformatted it to fit. thoughts?