~Zoe~

United States

Kindness is choosing love over hate, light over darkness, and compassion over judgment.
-Anonymous

est. 8.17.20

Currently Reading: Plain Bad Heroines

#BlackLivesMatter, #LoveisLove

Message from Writer

"I feel there is nothing more truly artistic than to love people." -Vincent Van Gogh

~ She/Her
~14
~Feminist
~Writer/Poet
~ENFJ-T/ Pisces/ Melancholic-Phlegmatic
~Musician
~Non-Religious
~lgBtq+

Loves: Iced Chai, Poetry, Autumn, Stars, Seashells, Music, Books With Beautiful Covers, French Fries, Art, Dreams, The Sea

ʙᴜᴛ ʙᴇꜰᴏʀᴇ ɪ ɢᴏ, ʀᴇᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ ᴏɴᴇ ᴛʜɪɴɢ,
ᴘʀᴏᴍɪꜱᴇ ᴍᴇ ᴏɴᴇ ᴛʜɪɴɢ;
ʙᴇ ʙʀᴀᴠᴇ ᴡʜᴇɴ ʏᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ ᴀꜰʀᴀɪᴅ.

Part 2 of Torn Soul and Broken Mind: A Collection of Short Poems.

November 19, 2020

FREE WRITING

4
i.
It isn't loud and heart-wrenching to me, I do not scream or sob, trying to find enough air to breathe.
I do not scream or lose my temper, I do not let people know what's inside.
Perhaps it's bad, perhaps I should scream and cry, perhaps I should yell. But I can't.
My smile's feel like ice to me, I do not understand how to other people they seem full of life and happiness.
My laughs are forced but no one seems to notice that, just like everything else they cannot see what's wrong. 
Maybe I should tell them, maybe I should scream and cry. But I can't. 
I just feel numb and cold. I feel like I'm in a dream, what's real, can someone tell me?
The world looks blurry and people's words inaudible and monotone. 
My dreams are too real, and my life too fake. 
I get confused, and when I wake up I think my dreams were real. 
The pain isn't loud in the way people think,
I feel numb, I stay silent, but to me, the silence is what's loud. 
The numbness is what's loud, I do not scream or cry but the numbness is worse to me. 
It's too quiet, it's too real. 
My life too fake. My pain too real. 

ii.
It happens over and over again, the excitement of a new season,
carving pumpkins, raking leaves.
It happens every year, preparing for the holidays,
new clothes, new food, new lives.
And then it's over. 
The pumpkins lie rotting in the backyard, forgotten by everyone,
despite how much we loved them, just weeks before.
Does anyone else find it scary, how humans give up things like that so easily? 
Does anyone find it scary how we forget these things,
how we move on and then repeat, the same things, over and over again?
Everything in this world has a pattern, a schedule, a routine,
that they follow no matter what, am I the only one starting to feel like I'm stuck?
Stuck in the routine of life?
We fear death, not knowing what's there,
thinking we are going to be stuck while watching something over and over again,
but am I the only one who is starting to feel like I am the living dead?
Watching the same things happen over and over again,
watching history repeat itself,
watching people say the same words over and over again,
watching the same routine of life, the routine of a day.
Breakfast, Lunch, Dinner.
Elementary school, Middle School, High School, College, marriage, retirement.
Over and over and over and over again, I feel so trapped. 
And I don't know how to escape. 
When will it end, and how will it end?
Who will be the first to break free of the ropes holding fast to our minds.
Who will be the first to break into the safe that holds the key to our freedom?
Who will be the first to break free from this neverending routine that has us trapped 
Inside our own minds. 





 
Part 2 of me just bleeding on to the paper, as people say. 

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  • November 19, 2020 - 12:16pm (Now Viewing)

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5 Comments
  • cloudi

    thank you for the comment on my piece, the Busy Day!


    10 months ago
  • midnight.summerrose

    Re: omg yes I have! thanks for letting me know!! Yay!I'll have to do a piece thanking everyone :)


    10 months ago
  • midnight.summerrose

    Re: thanks!! :)


    10 months ago
  • midnight.summerrose

    Re: don't worry! Thank you for writing one! :)


    10 months ago
  • midnight.summerrose

    Omg this is amazing!! :) Wow, wow, wow!! :) I love it sooo much! :)
    Re: no, I haven't yet.


    10 months ago