x.Anonymous.x

United Kingdom

TOMBOY,
14, almost 15 this year,
SAGITTARIUS

Message from Writer

I hope you had a great time reading and enjoy!

Welcome to my world

November 16, 2020

                                                Welcome to my world.
              
My world is different than yours. How? you ask. Well my world is how I see life. Just me. 
    In this world, there are people like you and me. However, there are differences from every day life. 

                    You may not know me and I not of know you. 
                        My eyes are the only ones that can see my world and you can see your own.
Nobody but you can see what your world. No one but you.

                                        If someone claims to be from "your world", they are lying. 

My aunt says she knows how it feels to be bullied, like me.
            I have been bullied for my whole life so far. No one but me can understand the pain I have been through.

                                                I have problems. Most unexplainable. Some can be explained.

I may look like your average tomboy. Although my soul may tell you a different story.
                    My soul? My inner self or whatever you what to call it. 

The main subject for my bullying, if I guessed, because I was different than others.
       I always like to be on my own 98% of the time, 1% with my fake friends and 1% with my family.

    I remember the time, when in my third school my so-called best friend became my bully. She turned all of a sudden     and the next thing I remember, her lips uttered that I give her £20 and a 200g jar of sweets "...or else" 

From that moment I knew I couldn't trust anyone, including my own family, again. So I locked myself away from others. Began to close every door, metaphorically and physically, for everyone to give up on me. Most did, others didn't. I could not be bothered for most things I enjoyed. By the time I moved to my fourth school, I was bullied more. I no longer shown any emotions the bullying was that bad. Then again, I only felt deep sadness for everything. 

                            It was rarely that I would smile and laugh at something or show any feelings at all. 


My family always ask me "What's in that 'world' of yours?" and I consistently answer "A wolf pack, MY wolf pack, we are in the deep woods among with other creatures who'd habitant it too. Then again the demons beyond the human soul-" However I on every occasion I get intruded at the best part by the questioner becoming commander and telling me to stop before I can continue therefore I mumble under my breath "...Where the prodigy creates darkness and the world I know is forever gone and soon is reborn into something much different."
 
                My life isn't what it is portrayed to be.
                My life is different.
                                           From everyone's view.



            I want to know that I can be normal. But I fear the normal. The normal is something I cannot be. Ever.

I live with pain and suffering always wanting to be normal.
Then again I immediately snap out of it.

The pain and suffering grew natural. It became my routine. My life outline.

    My life is somewhat like a bizarre, when you get caught in one, you will never make it out alive. Only if you're lucky.

"She calm down eventually" one of the voices said as the others were driving me to a point, where I could be classed as a insane person. But eventually I did calm down... after a few hours. What ticked me off? Well... Someone misjudged me, and I don't really like to be misjudged. Or talked about to be honest.     I knew if I went like that I actually won't be able to write this because people these days you know? 

I personally always thought I would end up in a mental home, with creepy paintings as the eyes watched you wherever you went, a person watching daunt fully as you sleep. And all you would hear is footsteps slowly creaked on every step of the stairs. The bedroom door handle turned slowly. Then again, I am back to reality. My own torture of a world.

It brought my family to tears when outspoken of my difficulties. So from that moment, I vowed to myself to not mention a single word about my world, where interminable ache. I always regretted talking out in front of others because of this very same reason. The agony of my family left me more broken, than I was before, I never bothered to talk at everyone. 

My world is difficult to be inside and no one can make their way in, but me. And only me.
I am x.Anonymous.x and this is my world.

 




 

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1 Comment
  • AJ - Izzy

    wow. This is so incredibly powerful, but also beautifully written. You're a very talented writer <3


    7 months ago