Book Kitten
My name's Alessia
Crazy Cat Lady

District 11
Subject B57 "The Sunshine"
Joined September 2020


Message to Readers

This is the final draft!! I hope you enjoy!


April 3, 2021


    As I exhaled, a cloud of air disappears into the murkiness. Dry shivering hands grasped my arms searching for any source of heat. My cracked lips bled down my chin, the cold air causing all of the moisture to vanish. Keeping my eyes wide open, I stayed alert for any sign of being accompanied in the dark.

    The shadows were so dense I couldn't see anything more than a foot in front of my face. They teased me with their curling tendrils of tangible darkness. Noise could be heard all around me - like groans of utter despair - the structure of this old house struggling to withstand the strong gusts of wind blowing outside.

    There was always something off in this place. A feeling that just didn't sit. It wasn't the rot you could see on the roof and scantlings, or the dust that has called multiple places home. There was a peculiar air to this house. Being left this house on the will of a deceased relative, I convinced myself to spend the night. That was a choice I would never bring about again. 

    Trying to relax, I extended my legs on the velvet mattress and push my head even deeper into the flat pillow. Grabbing the comforter, I pulled up to my shoulders. On a lampstand right beside my head stood a portrait of my deceased great-grandfather, his eyes piercing into mine. A small sliver of white moonlight illuminated it. The look he held on his face was unidentifiable, a mix between stern and bitter. I reached for the portrait, uncovering my shivering arm, and faced it down. Quickly drawing my hand back, I had an odd feeling that maybe a shadow lurking in the darkness may snatch it, never to let go. 

    I tossed and turned, trying to fall asleep and forget about my surroundings. When I found all of my attempts in vain, I turned back into the position I was in earlier.
Something was different, something had changed. The feeling was undeniable.
At first I didn't notice but after a few moments I realized what was off. 
The portrait of my great-grandfather was standing upright again. I quickly reached for the rusty oil lamp with quivering arms and lit it. The whole room lit up, the shadows danced along to the rhythm of the small leaping flame. The flame itself was attempting to escape this place. 

    The shadows morphed into different shapes and sizes - my eyes were tricking me. Every shadow I glanced at quickly contorted into some ghastly creature of my imagination. They danced on the poorly installed, ripped and stained, scarlet wallpaper. Some of the shadows eyes lit up with the same red as the walls. I looked back at the portrait; now able to discern a slight smirk in his twisted wrinkles.
Panic rose inside my chest; my heart was pounding at an insane rate. My blood was rushing, and there was a heartbeat in my fingertips. I couldn't do anything, I couldn't run, hide, or even blink. I had lost complete control of my body. Limp, I stared at the shadows parading around my room. Maybe they bore evil grins that rose past their noses, or teeth that shone out complementing their horrible red eyes. 
My breath was moving so fast that my chest was almost vibrating. My whole body tensed, I struggled against the invisible ropes of fear holding me down. Sweat started to trickle down my forehead, adding to the blood dripping down my chin. Whether the sweat was only from the struggling or the fear, I would never know. Maybe it was from both. 

Slowly I gained control of my frozen body, but my eyes never left the same spot. While all the other shadows danced around, mimicking the flames frantic movements, one never moved. It stayed in the same place the whole time. It never flickered or showed any sign that it was just another shadow. The eyes glowed a deeper red than the walls.
Hiya everyone!!
Thank you to:

For your amazing and super helpful reviews! Love you all!

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  • BriRiley

    Re: It’s done!

    6 months ago
  • BriRiley

    Oh and what do you want me to write about exactly? Like how writer/authors are like alchemist? And they can change our view on the world?

    6 months ago
  • BriRiley

    Ooo, I would love to do that! I’ll tell you when I’m done :D

    6 months ago
  • Nyla

    Ooooh I love this final draft! So eerie! Great job! :)

    6 months ago
  • Writing4Life

    Oh this looks great! And no problem! Glad to help :D

    6 months ago
  • Writing4Life

    Re: Thank you!

    6 months ago
  • Emi

    This is so eerie! I love how you end it in a really frightening moment after building up the fear and tension.

    6 months ago
  • BriRiley

    Ooo! The changes are perfect! Good gob!

    6 months ago