United States

est. 2018
she/her | poeian/pathian
obsessed classics enthusiast & linguist.
humanism + romanticism = writing inspiration

Message from Writer

ǝǝɹɟ ʎllɐʇoʇ 'dǝǝʞ ʇsnɯ noʎ lnos ɹnoʎ ʇnq / ǝǝs noʎ ʇɐɥʍ ǝɓuɐɥɔ uɐɔ ı sǝʎǝ ɹnoʎ ǝɯ puǝl

premature dates

October 25, 2020



i. and as a good catholic girl, i asked him; and he said no,
he's never smoked a cigarette but i could taste the alcohol
on his lips. but his eyes held a lifetime i've never lived and
i just wanted to at least scratch the surface of some sort of
rebellion; instead, i fell victim to my unbecoming and his
collecting of my heart like it was a trophy worth collecting.

ii. one night he promised me something worth believing and
foolishly i started bleeding out all the truths my life's been
bandaging (learned about scars i didn't even know existed
'til the words fell from my lips); so then, he asked me
to write him something for his birthday but my response
wasn't satisfactory, but i only knew that 'cause he watched
the color from his eyes fade in mine; i told him, i could
write you birthday poetry, but that's for you to keep. funny,
when tombstones are meant for people ts the others that
get to read.
; he doesn't understand the scatterbrain that
an author's mind becomes, since everything because nothing
and nothing always becomes more than it's supposed to be; 
so instead, i wrote this poem about us instead.

iii. my parents grew to like him from the poisonous lies
i continued to feed them; they'll never know of the toxicity
until it becomes one of our fallings; and he was the genius
that i could never catch up to, but t his friends he was just
the playboy dating the nerd who somehow became pretty;
yes, high school's truly like that.

iv. if i chronicled all our dates, who would want to read such
a doomed love story?; star-cross lovers still love each other, 
they don't go being the ruining of one another; so no i wouldn't
want to share our journey anyway, there's so much misery and
heartbreak; remind me, why i even desired to stay?; then i
remember the way his skin felt under my fingers and how the
gold tears trickled between our lips are as kissed and i remember
there was a reason; it just wasn't a very good one.
so on an unrelated note, i've gone on 2 dates with this super cute guy and he's absolutely bloody amazing and things are going well, but since when did people start caring about labels? is he my boyfriend, idk but i hope he's not seeing other people. doubtful though, he's no *garden tool*


See History
  • October 25, 2020 - 10:49am (Now Viewing)

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  • anemoia (#words)

    this is gorgeous aching. the tombstone line. i can't... may everything work out as it should.
    also, i'm going to add you to my latest piece in the footnotes. you deserve it.

    4 months ago
  • Bhavya's Treasure

    'when tombstones are meant for people ts the others that get to read.'
    'but his eyes held a lifetime i've never lived' Gorgeous.
    The light humour sprinkled with some sadness hooked me! These premature dates were fun to run through. And well, the last line is quite clever!

    4 months ago
  • Mpm#1

    Ya know... in some ways, as a Catholic girl this is kind of relatable. I ended up dating a real creep for a little bit... part of me wonders if it was how “rebellious” he seemed. He was a decent enough guy, but waaaay too much like the dude from Heathers. 0-0
    So glad I broke up with him. This is so good... I think I’ll read it again! (I hate that whole “ iS hE yOuR bOyFrIeNd” thing after like one or two dates. Drives me absolutely nuts. Hope everything goes well between you two!)

    4 months ago
  • em wilder

    beautiful. love your word choice (toxic, poisonous, etc). really helps bring the mood and tone alive. love your writing! <3

    4 months ago