Wisp

United States

hold me and tell me everything will be alright

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est. 26.9.19

Message from Writer

I want to shed tears in the way it washes over you like a wave seeking solace. I want to succumb to the depths of the ocean and grab at handfuls of emptiness just to feel something worth feeling. I want to submerge, my last breath spilling out like disappearing ballads. And gosh I'm tearing along the seams.

Men Don't Wear Dresses

October 14, 2020

FREE WRITING

17
he was seven when he saw a princess movie, 
falling in love with her in all her beauty and charm, 
and when he went home, he found his mom’s makeup 
splattering it haphazardly upon his face to look like 
that princess, and his mother found him and scolded him 
and it’s cute when he’s six, but when he’s eighteen and
wearing makeup to school, his mother is ashamed 
to call him her son.

he was in love with that princess and asked his father
if he could dress up like her for Halloween, and his father 
sucked in a breath, redirecting him to the costumes of 
firefighters and policemen, telling him that he should 
try something on that a man would wear.
so when he was twelve and found the dresses far more 
appealing, he tried one on and fell in love with the way he 
looked, but the words of his father echoed in his head, 
and he hung it back on the rack, choosing a costume of 
a pirate instead, because men don’t wear dresses.
Raw, unpolished snippets. 
Yeah, that's right, breaking gender stereotypes!

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  • October 14, 2020 - 10:17pm (Now Viewing)

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18 Comments
  • crystalline•galaxies

    re: the funny thing is that my middle name was actually about to be artemis and was changed to athena later on, so it's kind of ironic that the second one you chose would be her. i'm not a huge fan of the name artemis, though, to be honest. if i'm going to go by any of these names, it would for sure be athena. i'm still thinking it over, so i will definitely keep you posted on what my final decision is. thank you for being so respectful... i'm in a weird mood and almost started crying over it... it really meant a lot.


    11 days ago
  • crystalline•galaxies

    re: i wouldn't mind being called athena, except for the fact that it is quite feminine and my relationship with my gender is extraordinarily complicated. maybe sometime in the future i'll be more comfortable with it, but right at this moment, i'm not entirely sure. i will update you if i change my mind, though! and it's such a gorgeous and sweet sentiment. you are so lovely. :')
    i also re-uploaded the piece to fix a couple of typos, and i mentioned your comment in my message to the readers -- is that okay? i'll take it down if you'd rather i did so, it was just such a gorgeous comment and i didn't want it to go all to waste.


    11 days ago
  • crystalline•galaxies

    re: i'm replying on an older piece, mainly because i discuss my birthname(s) and i don't want it to get all too far out there.
    the goddess athena has always really resonated with me. my middle name is athena, and from a young age, i think that kind of really sparked my interest in her. whenever someone mentioned her in anything, i kind of perked up because it related to me and it made me feel so cool to be named after a full-on greek goddess. it was pretty shallow until i got older, and then i started learning even more about her and appreciated my namesake so much more than before. she was everything i wanted to be. (you can imagine my excitement when i read the percy jackson series for the first time. i mean, within the fandom, i could categorize myself into the athena cabin -- how awesome is that?) i never really thought about the entire implications of choosing her specifically until i read your comment. and that quote that you found? my goodness, it was absolutely gorgeous! i almost want to rewrite the entire piece to incorporate that, but i'm just not sure how i would do it. maybe i'll write more pieces about athena in the future. basically what i guess i'm trying to say is that there wasn't really much thought into choosing a greek god to compare myself to, because i really did always want to be athena and, at least by name, i was already partially there. but your comment really brought depth and a certain beauty to that comparison that had never occured to me before.
    but out of that entire comment, the one that really made me smile (though all of it did, if i'm going to be honest) was the comment on vulnerability in my piece. through my writing, i try to be completely honest and write about how i see myself -- it just so happens that in my mind's eye, i'm constantly a lost child who needs guidance for everything. now that i think about it, i would almost say that that piece was written to current me as well as younger me. but anyway, that view often seems to lead to vulnerability, and that compliment is honestly one of the nicest things someone could say about my writing. sorry for the ramble.
    from the deepest depths of my heart, thank you. <3


    11 days ago
  • dream02

    **often


    about 1 month ago
  • dream02

    Amazing. This is absolutely fantastic. Isn't it funny how so offend our parents, who are supposed to support and love us, make us ashamed or scared about how we feel?


    about 1 month ago
  • Anlee

    wow wow wow i love how you brought to light toxic masculinity in the form of princesses. i actually have a younger cousin who used to love "girly" things but stopped deviating from the standard male behavior because he's embarrassed. i want to show this to him but i dont think he'll understand (he's chinese). maybe the next time he visits ill pull out google translate :)
    re: tyty <3


    about 1 month ago
  • FantasyOtter12

    Oh wow this is so powerful. Just. Wow incredible ditto to everyones comments...


    about 1 month ago
  • journal.scribbles

    Wow this is so powerful and has such an important message! I love this!


    about 1 month ago
  • mirkat

    Re: Thank you so much for your kind comments! It made my day.


    about 1 month ago
  • crystalline•galaxies

    yes! *claps loudly*
    YESSS!!! *standing ovation*
    this piece is pure facts!


    about 2 months ago
  • Anne Blackwood

    Re: Thank you, me too. (Yes it is comforting)


    about 2 months ago
  • Dmoral

    yIKES that's a long comment, longer than i thought lol. and yeah, now here's my 3rd (and last i think) comment on this piece. yes, i saved the last 2% of my laptop battery for this!! xD


    about 2 months ago
  • Dmoral

    before i starts ~ yes, i saw your lovely comment in the morning--what a great way to start the day ;)

    "falling in love with her in all her beauty and charm,"
    okay, so i love how this starts off. the foreshadowing here is subtle and allows for our natural bais' and beliefs to leave us up with an interpretation- which of course, is wrong lol.

    "he found his mom’s makeup / splattering it haphazardly upon his face to look like / that princess,"
    okay, so this is where i feel like the irony is most at play, and i love that. (if i remember correctly from English class from forever ago, situational irony? maybe? anyhow,) i love how this is almost his "beginning" if you will, and that you write is so naturally. there was no peer pressure, no "seeing someone else do it", not even mere exposure effect- no, this was him seeing something he liked and then trying to embrace it. and you wrote it so wonderfully, pointed out this concept so beautifully direct, that it opens eyes--even the eyes of people who aren't blind by this.

    "and it’s cute when he’s six,"
    ah yes, the unspoken benefits of youth. also, the simplistic diction like "cute" works so well here and other aspects of the piece.

    "but when he’s eighteen and / wearing makeup to school, his mother is ashamed / to call him her son."
    as intended, this hurts the reader's heart. this is written so we sympathize with the reader----and it's done wonderfully. the change from "when he" (back when it was okayish) to "but when he" (to the intolerance), is so subtle, but still powerful.

    "his father / sucked in a breath"
    you write this so realistically and for that i stan.

    "try something on that a man would wear."
    2 things about this. 1: i love how you bring up this mindset, it's awful, stereotyping, degrading--but the mindset of hundreds of people across the globe. so it's like, we know it's coming, but once it does come, it still astounds us because ethically, that's awful. 2: it's italicized!!! great way to use formatting to your advantage, and personally, i'm a sucker for italicized dialogue compared to putting it into quotations.

    "he tried one on and fell in love with the way he / looked, but the words of his father echoed in his head, "
    so this isn't really bittersweet, but sweetlybitter-in the order it's written. you give us something to hold on to, something to love, something sweet--we almost want to raise our hopes up. but then the bitter hits and the poor boy's doomed destiny settles in and it still hurts us all the same, which is not okay, but okay.

    "because men don’t wear dresses."
    goodness, that ending. i will admit, i enjoyed the title being the first thing we read, and then that same line being the last---almost like a poetic circling ending. it works wonderfully, strengthens the power, and doesn't take away from the piece at all.

    overall: i felt like this was poetry i'd receive in class to analyze. there were so many literary devices used that advanced the piece thoroughly. the message was well-received, and i just know some people connect with the character--even if it isn't with the dresses and makeup. the beauty of a piece like this, is the magic of interpretation and broadening of the message. Directly, it's about a boy not accepted by his parents when he just wants to wear makeup and dresses. But overall? there are layers here: self-identity, identity crisis, acceptance, conformity, individualism, relationships, family relationships, etc. it's just amazing, really, how you combined all this in that small of a text.

    minor critiques (aka things i noticed, so nothing major really):
    -"Halloween" is capitalized, but nothing else is in the text, so it's a bit of an inconsistency.
    -there wasn't really a flow? like, i was reading it, and (this might just be how my brain works lol) i was searching for the rhythm but it was very hard to find and at some points, i felt like there wasn't really one
    -if you wanted to capitalize something, maybe the "f" in Father and "m" in Mother since that's what's causing his conformity and creating power over him?
    -the Father had italicized dialogue, but the mother didn't. maybe adding it? i feel like it adds to the piece and gives us her insight as well, balance almost

    xxxx yeah, yeah, ik, this could've been a review but, oh well *shrugs*


    about 2 months ago
  • Dmoral

    brb, tomorrow i'll properly comment on this love (just liking it now so i have it "saved to my feed". worked the cash register today and the number of Karens who i came across was ungodly, so i'm drained. so yeah, 'morrow


    about 2 months ago
  • Currently Unavailable

    Woah! So powerful!


    about 2 months ago
  • Paisley Blue

    Ooh i loooooove this!!! It reminds me of a drawing my friend did of our teacher angrily stomping on gender stereotypes XD this is wonderful <3


    about 2 months ago
  • 4ExtraShotsOfEspresso

    I love this! Fricc gender stereotypes!


    about 2 months ago
  • Written wintermagic (#holidayvibes)

    That's sweet. I never understood why you get shunned. for wearing different clothes. It's not cool people, just lay off.


    about 2 months ago