anemoia (#words)

United States

WtW's resident "the cool cousin you see once a year, but the conversation you guys were having a long time ago picks up where it left off without missing a beat" (rosi)

Child of God
logophile
athletic nerd

Female
Soph.

Message to Readers

Please REVIEW and leave feedback! Thanks!

You have one minute to explain what you're doing here.

October 13, 2020

PROMPT: All Talk

4
    You have one minute to explain what you're doing here, then I'm kicking you off my property.
    Mikey, Mikey. Still hung up on the past?
    Call me that again and you'll get a boot in your soft spot. Thirty seconds.
    Your ex-girlfriend sends her regards. And she made you these scones.
    A
pple with a jar of salted caramel sauce to go with?
    You know it.
    That gets you in the door. Come on. And don't touch my scones. So, why have you been in contact with Laney?
    She's my friend.
    
Friend. Right. If she's just your friend, then I'm your real brother.
    Are you still not over that? And watch what you imply.
    
I'll never be "over that," and I can imply anything I want.
    ​I didn't choose to lie to you. Blame Ma.
    You still went along with it! Hiding the fact that my birth certificate reads "Michael James McGregor." When all my life, I thought it would be "Michael James Bingley." Like Ma and Pa. Like you.
    What would you have done if Ma asked you to keep that kind of secret? It's not like there's a right time to tell your little brother, "Hey, you're actually my half brother. Ma had an affair right before Pa died."
    You could have tried.
    I did. You just don't remember.
    Ivan, why are you still here?
    Because scones and salted caramel.
    
Good point. Mm, she sure knows how to bake. What else does she know, brother?
    Look, I'm sorry I had to lie to you—
    Oh? Tell me, did Laney promise you her eternal devotion yet?
    No, you idiot. About the brother thing. I really am sorry. But we had that fight almost five years ago and five hundred times since. We've been adults long enough. Don't you think it's time to act like it and move on?
    It depends on whether you're shacking up with my ex.
    Dragging out drama! Michael J. Bingley, I swear that's all you want to do whenever we see each other. But for what's it's worth, Laney and I are just. Friends.
    Bingley? 
    I didn't—I mean—
    
Am I part of the family, finally?
    You always were. 
    Really? 
    C'mon. Up until you found out, you had seventeen blissful years and never doubted that. 
    Nearly an entire childhood, I guess.
    See? Having a different set of Y chromosomes doesn't change a thing. Our biological relationship has nothing to do with being family. 
    There you go, being all science-y. I always thought that was cool, you know. Having an older brother who was gonna be the next Albert Einstein. Even if I didn't understand half of what you talked about.
    You thought that? Me? 
    Of course. I mean, you brought home discarded honors textbooks for fun! Meanwhile, I was fumbling with a football.
    Fumbling pretty good, too. The best tight end in the county, they said. But at least I played baseball, kept me from being a complete nerd. And honestly, I wanted to be more like you.
    Me? The goof-off, the troublemaker, the jock, the charming, handsome idiot? Okay, I see why you'd want to be me. Heck, even I would want to be me in high school.
    Exactly. I was more on the path to becoming the next Gregor Mendel with a baseball hobby and a decent haircut.
    
Who's that?
    Just a genetics scientist that I admired a lot. I wanted to be more like him than Einstein. The advances he made... oh, man.
    You never told me.
    You never asked.
    Well... maybe it's time—
    That we start asking.
    
Why don't we start now?
    That's the best idea you've had since the treehouse.
    Ah, that treehouse. Those are memories I'll be telling my grandchildren about when they ask about the "good ol' days."
    We really did have a good life, growing up. Still do. 
    You bet we did. Just took a while for me to see past seventeen. Here, have a scone. I'll warm up the caramel sauce.
    Any coffee left?
    
Nah, but you can brew a few cups. The filters are in the cabinet above the coffee pot, bottom shelf. Don't use the coffee in the clear container unless you wanna be bouncing off the walls.
    Thanks, Mikey.
This ended up being longer than I intended. One of my few late-night writing sessions. (Is 10:00 late to you? Feels late to me!) Anyway, I'm going to release this story later with a little more detail. Not anything as far as background or exposition, but a little setting, movements, dialogue tags, and emotion. I think it'll be good to compare and contrast those to see if my dialogue only conveys the right messages.
This is about two brothers who can't seem to move out of the past. Mikey is the younger one, while Ivan is three years older. I imagine them being southern, sort of cowboys, and raised on tradition, good manners, tough love, and hard work.

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  • October 13, 2020 - 12:00am (Now Viewing)

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5 Comments
  • (sk)eyesofocher

    this. is. AMAMAAAAAAAAAZING


    7 months ago
  • katnissromanoff

    Wow! I love this so much! Even without any background information and just words, you made the characters and their story so vivid. Amazing job!


    7 months ago
  • ChocolateKiwi

    This is so good!

    Re: Thank you so much for the book recommendations!


    7 months ago
  • ✧♬TwinklingLights♬✧

    omg, i was sucked in! There's so much great vagueness that the readers can guess upon. And the drama! LOVE!


    7 months ago
  • Stone of Jade

    this is great!! it tells a lot for a story in just dialogue!! Really well done!


    7 months ago