AJ - Izzy

Canada

How to write all of me in less than 10 seconds?

Hmm, let me think... how about DREAMER?

Yup. That works.

Message to Readers

I can't be sure if some of these questions have answers, it's a bit of a blur. Is it poetry, is it fiction, is it real, I don't know. But I can say this: I can talk to hundreds of people in one day, and none of them compare to the smile you put on my face.

do i love u?

October 23, 2020

FREE WRITING

12
do i love u?

Do you love me?

Do I love you?

Can I love you? Is it too soon? Too raw? Too real?

Is this love?

What is love?

If this isn't love, what is this? 
This feeling of admiration, of care, of butterflies and shooting stars, of dreaming and visions, of a life with you... with you?

Can this be love?

Is love its own agenda?
Its own rules? Its own devilish creature?
Its own cruelty?

Is love free? Or does it come at a cost?

Is love real? Is this real?

How can this be real, when everything in the mind turns to dust?

How can this not be real, when I feel this way towards you??
When I feel that feeling, that burning... that beauty.

When I look into your eyes, sad and overwhelmed... I yearn to help and to comfort you. It's all I know.

When I look into your eyes, happy and pure... I feel your smile, your laugh, your joy. It's all I want.

When I look into your eyes and see this feeling... this love?... suddenly I'm scared. Pulling away. Questioning. 

How do I stop my mind?

How do I end this doubt?
This emptiness?
This F E A R ?

But I can't let go. Why?

How does one dissolve into this feeling, this feeling of, love...?

How does one take the butterflies and set them free, and fly with them... free from the pain?

Is love painful?

Is love worth it?

Is this love?

I want to be loved. Truly.
Is falling hard a mistake? Will it become the greatest decision I've ever made? Will I regret it?

Or will it become my future?

Will you become my future?

Do I love you?

Do you love me?

do i love u?
Just your usual train wreck of thoughts.

Print

See History
  • October 23, 2020 - 8:44pm (Now Viewing)

Login or Signup to provide a comment.

9 Comments
  • Livsnjutare

    I really like this piece! Great writing!!


    7 months ago
  • Anlee

    nice flow of rhetorical questions! the ending "do i love u?" in lower case makes it feel like the speaker has shrunk into their own corner and is lost/defeated/small. <3


    7 months ago
  • mirkat

    ooh beautiful! i just have to echo the comments below... amazing writing and you will figure it out eventually. keep writing in the meantime (and aftertime-- if that is a word)! <3


    7 months ago
  • AJ - Izzy

    Thank you, everyone, I'm glad you enjoyed reading it! I'll figure it out someday :)


    7 months ago
  • anemoia (#words)

    Ditto on what Mpm#1 said... every teenage feeling ever, but written beautifully.


    7 months ago
  • Mpm#1

    DARN IT I DON’T WANT THIS TO SOUND FAMILIAR! But it does. Man you captured the feelings and confusion behind these questions so well! Love this piece!


    7 months ago
  • Paisley Blue

    beautiful way to put words to the thoughts that dance in my head more often than not... i hope you find your answers like i did :)


    7 months ago
  • dream02

    Yes. Just Yes. This is amazing


    7 months ago
  • YouAreEnough

    I do "love" this piece.


    7 months ago