Peer Review by seaomelette (United Arab Emirates)

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"Wait."

By: dream02


PROMPT: All Talk

"Hey. Can we talk?"
"Fine."
"You've been ignoring me. And don't just claim that you haven't been receiving my texts. Your read receipts are on. Im not stupid."
"I've just been busy."
"I miss talking to you, I miss talking about boys, and laughing."
"Okay."
"I feel like you don't even care."
"Probably because I'm sick of pretending to."
"What?"
"I just felt pity for you because you're so dorky."
"I-"
"And because you don't have friends."
"I do. I just thought we were friends."
"Sorry I have to go now. I'm hanging out with my friends."
"Addie, wait."

Inspiration came from convo with my old friend, let me know what y all think!

Peer Review

I can definitely picture the two characters - Addie, mean and superficial, and her "friend", sad, confused, and upset. I loved how you were able to convey such poignancy through such a short dialogue, especially through that "Addie, wait" at the end.


Even though it was just dialogue, I feel like you really conveyed the story, and captured the essence of these two characters. When I finished reading, I immediately read it again because I really felt that same shock and bereft-ness as the main speaker.


Reviewer Comments

Keep up the awesome writing! ^-^