Tomb of Jade (#spookified)

United States

~ 16 she/her ~
Aspiring writer and artist. Completely awestruck by night skies. Apart of many, many fandoms ;) Reader, journaler, collector.
~ pilot pens and beat-up notebooks ~
one half of the locket

Message to Readers

This is my newly edited draft for this month's competition. Any feedback is appreciated. Comments are just as helpful as reviews. Please let me know what you guys think!

A big thank you to:

Rohan's Defender
The Ravenclaw Pheonix
and Landofstories

for their super helpful reviews and encouraging feedback! If you haven't already, I suggest going and checking out their pages! They are some truly talented writers.

Also...thank you to all those who showed so much love on my previous drafts. It means more than you realize!!

Anyway, I hope you have an amazing day! Byeee! *small wave*

End of the Nineteenth Century

September 16, 2020

Calme-toi Lydie! Take a breath before you tell me your news!” Lydie’s mother said from where she sat peeling potatoes for dinner.
        Lydie tried to calm herself, but she felt as if she would burst from excitement.
        “Maman! Theo and Rafael asked to take Adelaide and me to the fair tonight!”
        “To l'Exposition Univeselle! How did they get tickets?” Lydie’s mother asked.
        “Maman, you know the boys have been working on the Eiffel Tower for the last year or so. They got the tickets through one of the constructors. Please, may I go?”
        “You'll have to ask your father, but I doubt he will let you go. He has been against the tower from the beginning--”
        “What’s this?” Lydie’s father asked as he entered the kitchen. 
        “Adelaide and I have tickets to the World’s Fair tonight! The Eiffel Tower is finally finished, they say it is the archway to the fair. Wouldn’t it be magnifique to see?”
        “You wish to see that ‘truly tragic streetlamp’?” her father asked, picking a newspaper off the table and glancing it over.
        “Père, Le Temp published those artists’ protests a year ago! It is not a réverbère, Gustave Eiffel himself said it was an impression of strength and beauty! Please, may I go?” Lydie held her breath in anticipation. She longed to go to the fair, not just to see the Eiffel Tower, whose construction had been of particular interest and debate all throughout Paris for the past two years, but to see the exhibits from countries outside the small Parisian streets she knew so well. 
        “I do not think it would be wise for you to be exposed to such change,” her father said gruffly. 
        Lydie gasped at her father’s remark. “Paris will not stay the same forever,” she countered. “Trying to stop the future is like trying to stop a train! C'est impossible! Plus, it will be educational.”
        “Éducatif!” Lydie’s father guffawed. “It is not good for a young girl to be overwhelmed with cultures.”
        “Raymond!” Lydie’s mother exclaimed. “Not all change is bad.”
        “J’ai pris mon décision! She will not go!” Lydie’s father threw the newspaper on the table and left the kitchen. Lydie’s mother turned to her daughter. 
        “I say you should go,” she said. 
        “Oui, a little adventure is good for you.”
        “Merci!” Lydie lept from the table, crowding her mother with a hug before rushing out of the kitchen to tell her friend the good news. 
Laughing in their freedom, Lydie and Adelaide ran, hand in hand, through the softly lit, cobbled streets of Paris. The cool spring air, mixed with the thrill of the night, brought youthful color into their cheeks. They passed rows of uniform houses, decorated with winding vines and flowers. Lydie and Adelaide caught a tram which took them the rest of the way to Champ de Mars, where Theo and Rafael stood waiting in front of a large archway.
        "Tu es magnifique,” Theo said as Lydie took his arm. Lydie blushed at his remark as he led her into the fair.
 The massive tower, which had caused so much debate, stood proudly as the entrance to the fair. The blues, whites, and reds of the French flag, a symbol of great victories of progress, decorated the beautiful tower, reminding those who entered of the revolution that had liberated France. To Lydie, the tower symbolized the spark of new beginnings which burned throughout the country. She felt excited to live in the change of a century.
As they walked under the tower’s arched legs, Lydie could hear a band playing la Marseillaise, France’s anthem. Fountains sprayed water out of delicately carved spouts. Refreshment stands and carts were scattered throughout the park and gardens. Crowds of people were making their way in and out of the many exhibit entrances. 
        “We have a treat for you girls,” Rafael said, disappearing into the throng of people. “Donnez-nous une minute!
Lydie was speechless. Thousands of people were attending the opening night of the World’s Fair. Lydie saw foreigners with great turbans and robes, women with gorgeous dresses, each decorated with jewels which glittered under the light of the gas lamps. The laughter, the cries of amazement, announcers’ voices advertising exhibits, and smells of flowers and food surrounded her in the best possible way. She thought of her father’s remark: “too many cultures.” Was there such a thing as too many? To Lydie, the world seemed more colorful and diverse with the many cultures and customs adorning it. 
        As Theo returned, he took her hand, “It’s breathtaking, isn’t it?” he asked, laughing as the lights of the tower reflected in Lydie’s eyes. “Just wait...your surprise is even better!”
        Theo and Rafael led their dates towards the tower. 
        “What could be better than this?” Adelaide teased. 
        “Instead of viewing Paris from below, how would you like to see all of Paris from above?” Rafael beamed as he handed the girls their entry tickets. They were lost for words at the chance to climb the celebrated tower.
        Each out of breath, yet full of dizzying anticipation, the young couples reached the top. Stepping out onto a wide platform, they were met with a view only few had ever seen before. Lydie stared with wonder and astonishment as the night sky stretched before her; the moon’s crescent appeared almost touchable as the stars seemed to dance to the music from below. All of Paris could be seen. The colors of the flag were projected from the top of the tower, shining on the banks of the Seine. The Crystal Palace and gardens of Champs-Élysées reflected the glow from thousands of gas lamps scattered throughout the fair.
        Lydie's heart beat fast at the view. She recalled something she had read by Gustave Eiffel; the tower itself was modern, maybe too modern for those like her father, who stubbornly hung onto the old days, but it possessed a new type of beauty. 
        “This really is the end of the nineteenth century,” she whispered.

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  • beth r.

    this is great!
    re: aw thank you! (jayden says thanks lol) also, mr mustard tho XD

    about 1 month ago
  • Writing4Life

    Re: Whoops, you're right, sorry! LOL

    about 1 month ago
  • Writing4Life

    Re: Thanks! I'll hopefully finish yours in the next few days ^^

    about 1 month ago
  • Rohan’s Defender

    AMAZING! This is soooooo greattttttt!!!! Fantastic work! And thank you for the shout out! :) Good luck!

    about 1 month ago
  • ~Zoe N~

    Nice! I will review this today or tomorrow, do you mind reviewing my historical fiction piece???

    about 1 month ago