Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
Message to Readers
Anyways to improve this is appreciated! I hope this is what the prompt meant. Please tell me what you think, and any titles ideas too!
All the lines are very meaningful, but I like the last one the most, "I see the future, while you see now." It's short yet powerful.
Please refer to the parts I highlighted.
Who are "I" and "you?" Are you implying that "I" is a positive view of the world and "you" is a negative view, or "I" is a wise person and "you" is a narrow-minded person? If so, I think that "I see the smile upon their face while you see the sadness" is a little contrary. I've read many stories where people had to hide their true emotions behind a smile, as it's a common theme. If "I" is the wiser view (which I inferred from the last line) it should be "I" seeing the emotions behind the smile.
I like how you capture many different things that are "unseen," and this piece has a very good idea!
Keep up your work, keep on writing. Good job on this one! Don't be discouraged from my many points of possible improvement, I simply believe that for writers to improve, it's better for them to receive more criticism than compliments, and I do what I want others to do for me.