Peer Review by happy butterfly (South Africa)

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inconsistent ramblings of my nom de plume (republishing for peer reviews)

By: Anne Blackwood


FREE WRITING


i love queen anne's lace, but i think that's only because it's the name i bestowed upon myself. but
i am not a queen. a princess, maybe; a golden sprite
who just wants to spread a little bit of fairy dust as she flies among the flowers and leaves.

my poems are not usually very long. some writers craft words into writing that drifts on and on,
like bits of spider silk twisting itself through the wind.
no, when i write, i am pulled between never-ending verse and
something concise.

sometimes i pretend a song belongs to me, that each word was crafted in my mind.
can you blame me? when music pours out of my heart, it isn't a sin to wish for it to have my name on it, any more than it is to
pick a favorite spot at the edge of the bleachers and label it as my own.

and now i've written more than i intended, and i suppose it's ironic. because
i said i don't write much in a piece that drags itself into too much space.
it's fitting, isn't it? for i've always been a contradiction; an oxymoron. or a hypocrite, if you prefer bluntness to romanticized verse.

but i prefer to pretend life is more than what i see in front of me. i don't think there's anything wrong
with that. pain is easier to swallow in the form of honeyed words.
and so, i shall make-believe and sing for more joy than i feel. i shall paint myself beautiful,
and live in moments of poetry and sky.

Take what you will from this. I'm not exactly who you may think I am. Don't worry, it doesn't make much of a difference.
Also, if you got the not-so-subtle reference to another piece of mine at the end, props to you.

Message to Readers

What the heck is this?
UPDATE 11/21/20: This is an older piece I'm republishing since I plan on entering it into the Scholastics. Please give me constructive feedback in reviews and/or comments. Thank you!
Also: Do you think they would disqualify this due to it containing my first name? They don't allow identifying information to be in the piece, but I wasn't sure if this would count or not.


Peer Review

I love how you perfectly described your feelings.For example,the 3rd stanza and the first line in the last stanza.It's truly unbelievable.I feel like there isn't more to say,like I can't put it into words.Just the way you write about yourself and are able to explain yourself.This whole piece is beautiful.I feel like already said a bit in the highlights!


Just where I told you.Maybe adding more imagery where you want to explain how something felt or how you do things.It makes the reader feel so much more with you,because sometimes it can be hard to imagine.Also some words that you added (which I highlighted,just took a bit away from the line so just watch out for that.


Reviewer Comments

I love this piece so much! I hope this review was somewhat useful.I wasn't trying to be rude!Please go through my critisisms and make up your own mind because this is just what I think.And you have much more experience so I really don't want to make this piece worse/give bad advice.Anyways Goodluck! You will do well either way! If you want to ask me anything,you're welcome to.<3<3