Charlotte Bok Choy

Australia

Christian :)
Loves to read
Ravenclaw
Daughter of Athena/ or maybe Iris

Message to Readers

Hello everyone! I would love some feedback to help me improve my writing. I have also published chapter 1 of this story, so please read it first.

Fatal Return- Chapter 2

August 26, 2020

FREE WRITING

1
It's kind of hard to take someone seriously when they're hanging upside down over your levitating bed. That's why when Zyla asked me if I was planning on taking anyone else to Earth apart from me and her, I nearly threw a rock at her. By accident, of course.
"It's a great idea!" Zyla protests.
I fiddle with the purple shiny rock. Yeah, right. A great idea.
"Noooo. If we risk telling anyone else about this, they might tell the A-bots, and we could get in huge trouble." If the Authority Robots, or as they are most commonly known, the A-bots, found out about our plan to travel to Earth, we'd probably be put in the cells for a very long time. I can't risk anyone else finding out about the plan.
"Besides, most people have taken the drink," I say, "so nobody will be able to survive the trip apart from us." I brush my gaze across my purple bedroom as I speak, to avoid cracking up laughing from looking at Zyla's blood rushed face, courtesy of hanging upside down for too long. I see my built in VR simulator; my levitating rock collection; my wall projected with my art pieces, like digital drawing of me and Zyla; and my most prized possession, a real, 100% authentic piano. When my ancestors travelled to Earth, somehow they managed to cart a grand piano on the spaceship with them. The piano has been passed down through my family, and although all the keys have been replaced with much stronger rocks from Novorbis, the piano still works today. Sometimes I play it, and it makes me happy to know that I can play something no-one else in Novorbis even knows exists.
"Atamai would be a great person to take!" Zyla's absurd statement jerks me out of my day dream.
"What on Novorbis are you talking about?" I'm so shocked by Zyla suggesting that we bring Atamai with us to Earth, that this time I really do throw the rock at her. My levitating bed swerves to the side, so all the rock ends up doing is bouncing back into my lap.
"Atamai would be perfect. Just think about it! He's really smart, so he's sure to know all about Earth and spaceships and everything. Also, he hasn't taken the drink, so he will be able to come to Earth without dying!"
My mind drifts to earlier today: when I was sitting at the large, purple rock and crying. I remember how Atamai walked past and told me he knew how I felt. I've seen people like Fazen bully Atamai. He can't have it any easier than me. If Atamai came to Earth, he would be able to stop people from bullying him. He doesn't deserve to be bullied anymore then I do. But what if he doesn't want to come to Earth? What if he tells someone? If the A-bots find out.....
"Do you really think we're going to be able to steal a spaceship on our own Sheelo? We need someone like Atamai on our side," Zyla points out.
"Who said we were stealing a spaceship?"
"Well how else were you expecting to get to Earth, walking?"
"Well, no."
"Exactly. To infiltrate the lab where all the spaceships are kept, we are going to need someone smart like Atamai to help us."
"How do you even know Atamai's smart?"
"He's always answering questions in class, it seams like that guy knows the answer to everything!"
Zyla's never going to give this up, is she?
"Ok fine. We can bring Atamai, but no one else. This isn't some sort of quest or whatever like we do on VR games."
"Thanks Shee, I knew you'd see sense eventually."
"Knock, knock."
I jump. What was that? I turn around and see my door opening for mum.
"Hello Sheelo, hi Zyla, how was school today?" my mum asks.
"It was great thanks!" Zyla replies.
"Alright," I say.
"Are you girls hungry? Would you like a food pill or something?"
"No thanks Mum, I'm good."
"You all good, Zyla?" Mum asks my friend.
"I'm good, thank you though."
Mum and Zyla start talking about something, but I'm not listening. Seeing mum stirs up something inside me. My heart is beating really fast; I can feel my face reddening. It feels like a rock is rolling about in my stomach. What is this feeling?
Guilt.
I'm planning on leaving the planet without telling my parents! They're going to be so worried about me! They'll think I'm dead or something! Mum leaves the room, and it's just Zyla and I again. I open my mouth, ready to tell Zyla that we should just cancel the mission and stay on Novorbis, but another thought hits me. My parents are the ones who didn't let me take the drink. It's their fault this is even happening. Infact, they didn't let me take the drink because they believe it's possible to go back to Earth. So they probably want me to do this. Yes, that's right. This is what my parents wanted. They'll be happy for me. I'm doing the right thing by going to Earth; I'm doing what my parents want me to do. So instead of telling Zyla we should cancel the mission, I say:
"Let's go to Atamai's house and tell him everything!"
"Good idea," Zyla smiles, rolling off my levitating bed.
I stand up and open the door. Zyla and I walk down the shimmering hallway, past the family VR room, and we're about to walk out the front door when...
"Shee-shee, where are you going?" My 4 year old sister, Kippy, tugs at my shirt.
My mind goes blank, I don't know what to say. I can't exactly tell Kippy that I'm going over to a guy's house to plan a very illegal mission, but I don't want to lie to my innocent little sister either.
"We're just going over to a friend's house, Kippy," Zyla saves the day.
"Can I pweese come too?" Kippy's huge, brown eyes stare up at me, twinkling with a wistful begging.
"No, Kippy. Stay at home and play with Dino," I say; looking away as to not be swayed by those hopeful eyes.
"I don't want to pway with Dino. He's the most baddest bwother ever. I want to go with you, Shee-shee!"
"Leave your sister alone, Kippy," it's Dad. Thank goodness for Dad. "Go on girls, I'll keep this little rascal entertained."
"Thanks Dad," I smile. Dad and Kippy go off to the VR room, and Zyla and I walk out the door.
"Lucky for you, Sheelo, I know where Atamai lives!" Zyla exclaims once we're a safe distance from the house.
"Why do you know where he lives?" I give Zyla a confused look. Is she a stalker?
"His house is literally all anyone talks about at lunch time. It's like basically a shack, apparently. He lives on a dodgy street with all these hobos!"Zyla starts walking down the purple, shiny road. I follow her, and let her lead the road to Atamai's house. Well I can say that I've never heard anyone talk about this "shack" of Atamai's before, but then, the popular group never really includes me in their conversations.

We've been walking for a while, down the swirly, twinkly, smooth rock road. Zyla's whistling something, and I'm thinking. Seeing Kippy made me feel another wave of guilt. She loves me so much, what will she do when her big sister runs off to a distant planet? But I'm doing the right thing. I'm doing what my parents want. Going to Earth is basically obeying my parents. I take a deep breath, and drag myself out of my thoughts. Zyla has stopped walking. In front of us, the once smooth road stretches out forever like a bumpy and jaggard arm, reaching for something at the end of the street. The road is lined with small, lilac homes. I wouldn't call them shacks, but they're certainly much smaller than my house, or any other house I've seen.

"This is it," Zyla claims, walking up to a house. To me, it looks exactly the same as all the others. I follow Zyla up the rocky path to the door of the house. Zyla presses her hand against the front door, and I hear a faint, robotic voice call out:
"You have visitors."
My house does the same thing, all houses do. At least Atamai isn't living in complete isolation to the wonders of modern housing.
Faint footsteps ring through the house, getting closer and closer to the door, untill:
"Why are two young girls standing outside my house?" The door flies open, and a man who is older than anyone I've ever seen pokes his ugly head out. Seriously, this guy must be forty years old or something! He must not have taken the drink, because the drink stops you ageing when you reach 25 years old. This man isn't Atamai, and that's for sure. Zyla must have gotten the wrong house. I start edging down the path, back towards the road, when Zyla says:
"Hello sir, you must be Atamai's father. My name is Zyla, and this is Sheelo. We're friends of your son."
"Friends? I didn't know Atamai had any of those!" The man says, his mouth curving into a confused frown, "Atamai, there are friends here to see you!" he turns around and calls into the house.
A moment later, Atamai joins his father at the door. He looks at Zyla and I with unrecognition plastered on his face.
"Hi, Atamai! We're you friends from school, remember us?" Zyla's eyelid flashes in a wink.
The curly headed boy's forehead creases as he tries to place who we are. He look at me and his eyebrows rise rememberance.
"Oh yeah, I remember you guys. Come inside," Atamai opens the door wider for us, and we walk inside.
"I'm going scavenging, Atamai. I'll be back in a couple of hours," Atamai's father grumbles, walking out the door. I barely hear him, because I'm slowly turning around in the hall way. My eyes are soaking up Atamai's house like a sponge soaking up water. The walls are rocky, bumpy deep purple. There are digital pictures projected on the walls. They all feature a man, a lady, and a little boy. The photos line the wall, starting at the door and running to about half way down the hallway. In the last photo, the lady isn't there. It's just the little boy, who looks about 4, and the man. The boy is smiling, but the man's eyes are full of sadness. I tear my eyes away from the portrait and follow Atamai and Zyla down the hallway. We reach a small room, with a rocky table in the middle. We follow Atamai's lead and sit down.
"You're Sheelo, right?" he looks at me.
"Yeah," I nod, a bit awkwardly.
"Who are you again?" he tilts his head a bit and looks at Zyla. Well, this is a first. A boy remembers me but not Zyla? Fancy that!
"I'm Zyla. It's great to meet you Atamai. You're probably wondering why we're here?"
"I am."
"Well," Zyla takes a breath, "it's kind of a long story. You have to promise not to tell anyone, though."
"That depends on the story. If you've done something illegal, I may have to tell someone."
Zyla and I look at each other. I shrug. We might as well go for it.
"So," I breathe, shaking a bit, "you know how neither of us has taken the drink, and we get teased all the time, Zyla thought we should do something about it."
"I thought that you had taken the drink, Zyla. Fazen never bully's anyone apart from me and Sheelo," Atamai queeries.
"I've been keeping it a secret my whole life. I've never taken the drink either," Zyla explains.
Atamai nods, "so what are you planning on doing about it?"
"Is your mum or anything here? We can't have anyone over hearing this," Zyla blurts out. Uhhhh, so untactful! She must not have seen the portraits lining the hallway.
"Dad's gone scavenging. It's basically his job, so he won't be back for hours. I'm an only child, so we won't have to worry about siblings. And my mum, well, let's just say we definitely won't have to worry about her," Atamai replies.
"Your Mum, where's she?" Zyla queeries. I look at her in disbelieft. My mouth is slightly open and my eyes are wide. Why would she ask Atamai something private, that he clearly doesn't want to tell two strangers?
"She left Dad and I when I was four. I don't know where she went," Atamai simply states. I look at him with sympathy, and Zyla shuts her big mouth.
"Anyway, so no-one will hear. You can tell me the story now," the boy tries to smile.
"Ok, " I swallow, "Zyla suggested that we travel to Earth and you come with us and we can prove it's possible and no one will tease us anymore." I spit out in one, long, sentance.
"What?" Atamai closes his eyes and shakes his head.
"We're going to Earth, and you're coming with us," Zyla professes.
"Earth, as in Earth?" Atamai questions in confusion.
"No you dimwit, Earth as in Novorbis. Of course Earth as in Earth!" Zyla states. Gees, she doesn't have to be so mean! I suppose, she is part of the popular group, and to be popular, you have to be mean.
"You're planning on travelling to Earth?" Atamai looks at me.
"Yep. We'll steal a spaceship, fly to Earth, camp for a night, take some pictures, and then travel back. It will be simple! Everyone will stop bullying us because they'll realise travelling to Earth is actually possible!" I convey to him.
"You girls actually think that you are capable of stealing a spaceship and flying it?" Atamai asks.
"Well, we were actually hoping you would help us with that bit." Zyla admits.
Atamai stares at us, his face expressionless. I can almost hear the gears in his head grinding against each other.
"It's not worth it, " he finally verbalizes.
"What?" Zyla and I chorus.
"Travelling to Earth is not worth the risk of getting caught by the A-bots and spending life in the cells."
"But just think of a life where everyone loves you! You won't get teased, or bullied, or laughed at!" I say dreamily, imaging a perfect life. Who wouldn't want to be liked, to be popular?
"I don't want to be liked! I don't need people in my life. I have books!" Atamai asserts.
Without stopping to wonder what books are, I say: "We need you Atamai! Without you, we won't be able to get to Earth!"
"I'm sorry, girls, but what you're doing is illegal. I don't want any part in it. Besides, I barely even know you guys. Why would I want to help you?"
"Oh well, we tried," Zyla shrugs, standing up. I look at her, a bit concerned. She was the one who so desperately wanted to get Atamai to come to Earth! She can't just give up now!
"What do you-" I start to say, but Zyla winks. I think I see where she's going here, "yeah. I bet Atamai wouldn't even know how to break into the lab anyway." I stand up and walk over to Zyla.
"Let alone fly! Pfft, we'll be able to manage it better without him getting in the way." she adds.
I steal a quick glance at the boy, and see him sitting at the table, shaking his head. He's no idiot, he knows we are trying to trick him into agreeing to come with us.
"I bet he doesn't even know how to fly a spaceship!" Zyla denotes. That was the last straw.
"I'd be able to fly twice as good as you two bumbling baboons!  And I'll prove it when I fly to Earth," Atamai declares.
I'm so happy, I don't even care what a baboon is. Atamai is in! He's coming! Zyla and I are speechless. Smiles stretch across our faces, and my best friend can't seem to stop jumping up and down.
"So, when do we leave?" Atamai asks.
"How about tonight?" Zyla suggests.


After calling my parents and telling them I was staying at Zyla's for the night, and Zyla telling her parents she was at mine (Atamai said his father probably wouldn't even notice he was gone), we had packed a bag each. We raided Atamai's house for food pills, water bottles, expandable beds and blankets. Atamai also packed a bunch of books. They are these strange things made out of something called paper, and they have squiggly lines on them called letters. Atamai said they were used all the time on Earth, but since there were no trees to make the paper on Novorbis, they ceased to be made. Apparently, Atamai had kept the books belonging to his ancestors.

Fours hours later, the three of us are crouching  behind a large rock outside the Space Vehicle Lab. We are watching the bustling SV technicians performing all sorts of experiments inside. The dark sky stretches above us like a star littered dome. The bumpy, purple ground stretches  bare in front of us like a giant, empty obstacle to the SVL.
"How exactly are we planning on infiltrating a highly guarded, security camera lined, most likely booby-trapped lab full of extremely smart SV technicians and extremely dangerous chemical substances?" I whisper.
"Beats me," Zyla shrugs. Or, at least I think she shrugs. It's too dark to see out here.
"I've got it sorted," Atamai utters. "The old dress up as a Stormtrooper ploy. Works every time in Star Wars!"
"What on Novorbis is a Star War?" Zyla asks.
"Or a stormtrooper?" I add.
"You two are extremely uneducated," Atamai mutters as he passes Zyla and I a uniform. It's a baggy one piece, made out of some sort of light plastic. It's long sleeved, and from what I can tell in this light, seems to be dark blue.
"Are you expecting us to wear this insult to fashion?" Zyla demands.
"It's the uniform of the SV technicians. My dad used to be one, before mum left. Anyway, I stole these uniforms from his room, so if we wear it, we'll blend right in!" Atamai explains.
I must admit, it is a genius plan. And so original too!
Zyla and I crawl away, to find a rock of our own to get changed behind. The baggy plastic tries to cling to my skin, and it feels quite uncomfortable. I crawl back to the first rock, and crouch next to Atamai and Zyla.
"So what are we planning on doing now that we're wearing these oversized plastic bags?" Zyla asks Atamai.
"We walk up to the door, go in and hope we can blend in with the crowd. If someone notices us, then it's to the cells for us. We make our way to the room where the spaceships are stored, and then go from there." The boy answers.
"Alright well I suppose-" I start talking, but then stop. Something cuts me off. I can hear something, a muffled footstep behind us. Zyla and Atamai freeze next to me. I don't breathe. If this is an A-bot, then I'll be staring at the inside of a cell for the rest of my life. My stomach feels like a spaceship is zooming around inside it, and threatening to exit out my throat. Please don't see us, please don't see us, I silently beg the loudening footsteps.
"And what might you kids be doing, outside the SVL at this time of night?"

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  • August 26, 2020 - 5:09pm (Now Viewing)

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2 Comments
  • Charlotte Bok Choy

    Thank you so much! Here is a link to the rest of the chapters if you would like to read them: https://glidingonraysoflight7.blogspot.com/


    about 2 months ago
  • Rachaelgrace

    I feel like the first two chapters of this could be a real YA book! You’re really talented!!


    about 2 months ago