mooncake

Canada

Hi everyone! My name is Catherine, I'm a 15-year-old high school sophomore, and I like bubble tea and reading+writing during rainy evenings. Feel free to reach out to me anytime <3

(she/her/hers)

Message to Readers

Please provide any construction criticism you may have for me!! :)

Separation

September 26, 2020

I know what my heart is like
Constantly beating alone:
It is like a bright red car
Driving into the depths of dark
A million rain drops kissing its body,
Wind racing to embrace every inch,
But no true companion in sight.
Inspired by Edna St. Vincent Millay's poem "Ebb", and created from the her line, "I know what my heart is like"

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2 Comments
  • sci-Fi

    Re: Tysm!!! Yes, I am intending to one day publish my book. I don't know when that will be, but as of right now I'm trying to finish it before I turn 14.


    9 months ago
  • Coolgirl2020 (LOVE YA ALL)

    OK, I LOVE this piece! The only thing that could possibly do with some changing is the third line. Poems are all about the reader's interpretation, so when writing a poem, you should try to keep it as open as possible. When you use words like "it is" in a poem, it doesn't flow as well. If you were just to shorten it to "like a bright red car," this poem would be PERFECT! Amazing job! <3


    9 months ago