barelybear

United Kingdom

- she/her
- musicals (catch me rapping along to Hamilton ✌️)
- fantasy and dystopian fiction :)
- piano + trying (failing) at songwriting ✌️
- life goal = becoming fluent in le français ☕️
- joined this gem of a site August 2020
- INFJ-A

Message to Readers

Hi!
So I tried to be funny but I’m not sure how successful I was. Any tips or improvements would be greatly needed and appreciated ✌️
I hope you enjoy it and if not then thanks for reading it anyway :)

I think I need a cup of tea ☕️

August 9, 2020

You have nothing. Nothing. NoThIng.

I didn’t think it was possible for anything to be this empty, let alone my head. I mean even a tea bag is fuller and that’s supposed to be empty! Sure, you can squeeze it out with five varying sizes of spoon, but I tell you there is nobody that can get that last little drop out.

So even a tea bag has more ideas than you. Great.

Hang on a minute... That’ll be my inspiration! A tea bag. A tea bag that can think and move. It could be action-packed, with a ton of tension and huge sword fights on every other page. Mr Bag could really be called Earl Greyward - a pompous aristocrat by day and secret spy fighting fruit tea by night.

Have you actually lost it?

Okay so maybe it needs work. Don’t give me that look; I’m trying my best!

What if it was about coffee instead? The tea could fight the dastardly devious Dr Finley Ground - just take a moment to appreciate the name (; - I can already see it now, a bestseller in every shop down the country!

Ehem - still here. Just one word on that. No. 
Do you even have a clue what a story is? You can do so much better than whatever this is. 


Fine. We’ll drop that one. But I don’t see you with any ideas.
You know what? We’ve worked for at least two minutes - I think that deserves a break. Maybe the sun will cause a good old mid-walk epiphany. 

Oh. What fun. Or maybe it will cause some lovely sunburn.

Would you just zip it for a moment? Can you feel that breeze? It’s practically bursting with all sorts of whispered stories. I can already feel the ideas seeping into me and I think I have a keeper!

Really? Do tell.

Picture this. In a world full of corruption and secret evil, a lone undercover tea bag has to step up and -

Save the world from an evil coffee bean?

Yes!

No. 

Maybe tomorrow you’ll think of something better.

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23 Comments
  • Currently Unavailable

    Other people in the comments section: "Oh, I've had lots of people ask me if I'm sane or if I'm crazy"
    Me in the comments section: "I never have that problem! The only people who ask me that are the voices in my head..."
    And can I just say you are officially my hero? More than sixty likes! Obviously everyone agrees with me that this piece is AMAZING!


    3 months ago
  • BirdofPrey

    haha!! i've already lost it when people ask what my problem is I respond with "I have several"


    3 months ago
  • sycheng710

    wow! this is so relatable, unique, and funny! i actually laughed out loud at the "have you actually lost it?" part. i'm pretty sure all writers have experienced this sort of mind-numbing writer's block at some point, but kudos to you for getting inspired by your lack of inspiration. p.s. congrats on being featured on wednesday words! :)


    3 months ago
  • Tula.S

    I love this! You definitely succeeded at making it funny!


    3 months ago
  • Written wintermagic (#holidayvibes)

    It was so funny. I feel like this exactly what goes through every one's mind when they have nothing but an inanimate object for inspiration.


    3 months ago
  • Kaitlyn Reese

    Wow! This is amazing! I love the authenticity of your voice and how you portray the thoughts of the narrator! Everybody needs a bit of happiness through these times and you brought a smile to my face :)


    3 months ago
  • barelybear

    Thank you all so much for the really supportive comments! They make me so proud to read them all <3

    Actually a surprising amount of people want to see this idea done, so I might give it a go and hope it's not too cringey. :))


    3 months ago
  • RemovedUser1

    PS I'm learning French too, but I'm nowhere near becoming fluent XD Still learning the basics!


    3 months ago
  • RemovedUser1

    HAHAHA!! This is amazing! This is hilarious! Congrats on getting picked!


    3 months ago
  • Bonnie Park

    loved the uniqueness of this story, made me smile. hope you can continue this idea?


    3 months ago
  • therisingwriter

    Awesome Piece! t'calibrates my voice as I read, I love this really... Friend to the Dystopian -fiction.. that relates us. Great work!!


    3 months ago
  • happy butterfly

    hahaha i love this so much.it's so funny!!!
    oh and congrats on being feauturef,you deserve it:)


    3 months ago
  • Writing4Life

    Ah! J'adore le Francais! J'apprends a le parler!


    3 months ago
  • Writing4Life

    Ahhhhhh I love this so muchhhhh! Please make a actual story like thissssssssss (btw luv ur accent)


    3 months ago
  • Rohan’s Defender (Rudolph’s Defender #holidayvibes)

    Awesome! Congrats on being featured!


    3 months ago
  • dovetrees

    i LOVE this!! tea is such an easy choice to make when we're stressed (how many cups for gcse results tomorrow haha?) the style of writing here is amazing, definitely humorous and a pleasure to read! (also i see you love hamilton? me too!)


    3 months ago
  • birthdaycandles

    Wow this is great! I love the humour and the battle going on between the inner and outer voice of the writer, it reflects a lot what writing is like for me too sometimes! I love the addition of humour as well, it makes it a very enjoyable read :) Nice one!


    3 months ago
  • Anlee

    I love the contrast between the enthusiastic and the deprecating thoughts of the narrator. This kind of conflict is so relatable and humorous :P this piece definitely deserves the wednesday pick <33


    3 months ago
  • elliem

    I love this so much! You are so clever. This almost reminds me of someone fighting with a ghost friend that nobody else can see. (On a side note) I literally relate to everything in your bio: I love Hamilton and other musicals, I'm trying to become fluent in french, I try and fail to songwrite/play piano, and I love fantasy and dystopia books!

    This piece is so creative and written in both a personal and conversational way. Congratulations on getting the Wednesday pick, you deserve it! Have a lovely day.


    3 months ago
  • ect.13

    Aha this is fantastic! I LOVE a cup of tea and this piece was so relatable and really made me laugh - well done, and keep writing!

    [also please write a short story about Earl Greyward and Dr Finley Ground - I'm like, 99% sure that it what my life is missing right now haha :)]


    3 months ago
  • FantasyOtter12

    Dystopian fiction?!? My fav too :D maybe you would like Gone by Michael Grant.. Definitely a great book


    3 months ago
  • Rohan’s Defender (Rudolph’s Defender #holidayvibes)

    Haha haha!! This is GREAT! Everyone needs an extra laugh! I would love to see more like this! Also, (commenting on your bio) have you read The Lord of the Rings and/or The Hunger Games? I know they’re obvious choices, but those are my favs from fantasy and dystopian!


    4 months ago
  • Charisse Marison

    Oh my gosh this was great! Can't wait to read a story about the tea bag saving the world from an evil coffee bean ;)
    Tea for life!


    4 months ago