BlueMoons

United States

Hello, friends! I’m Blue, or Maddi, whichever :)
. . .
Sixteen year old homeschooler
. . .
Will hold passionate discussions about Tolkien, writing, cats, and the meaning of life
. . .
Philippians 4:6-7
Revelation 21:3

Message to Readers

Overall, I like this, but I still feel as if cuts could be made. Does anything sound unnecessary or awkward? Is the flow okay? Thank you :)

The Glass Girl

August 13, 2020

My best friend was a girl made of glass.
She held more stars within her than the most brilliant night sky, and she was lovelier than the brightest sunrise. Her laughter was a songbird’s— innocent, delicate, and relentlessly joyous. When she took my hand, I fell still, for I knew it was a precious thing. 
I always danced with patient, careful steps. She danced with spinning rainbows, and wild abandon, and I shouldn’t have cried when she shattered.
A glass girl could never have lasted in this world, and I should’ve known. 
Yet, for my best friend, I wept.

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7 Comments
  • BlueMoons

    And @Rohan’s Defender, sorry about the whole review thing, I was not aware that they processed them! Sorry for any confusion lol


    2 months ago
  • BlueMoons

    @And_The_Stars_Laughed, thank you tons! Your feedback is stellar, it made my day :) Okay, I did not know that, that clears everything up! Thank you for explaining! You have an awesome day as well!


    2 months ago
  • And_The_Stars_Laughed

    Wow, this is truly an amazing piece! I love the figurative language and the first line was stellar! I actually wrote a review too, I hope it gets to you soon! (After reviews are submitted they are moderated first so it usually takes about a day-ish to get to the person receiving them, in case you were wondering.) Again, awesome piece, and have a great rest of your day!


    2 months ago
  • BlueMoons

    Hello! I’m so happy you enjoyed it! Thank you so much for reviewing, it means a ton! But the review isn’t actually showing up on my device... I’m not sure what went wrong, but I’d super appreciate if you double checked that it went through :) And yay! Another Tolkien fan! Your username is fabulous, by the way :) Do you have a favorite character?


    2 months ago
  • Rohan’s Defender

    I wrote a review! I hope it’s helpful! Good luck!


    2 months ago
  • Rohan’s Defender

    This is AMAZING! I absolutely love it! Also, if you want a deep, long discussion about Tolkien, I’m the one! ;)


    2 months ago
  • Jasmine khawar

    Wow! This is incredible and beautiful


    2 months ago