Doodleninja

United States

pfp is Thinker & Prose from my series "Stereo Tropes Co."!

Christian
INFx-T

Full-time doodler
Comic artist
Hardcore Introvert
social anxiety gang
Mexipina
Obsessed with music
Homeschool squad, yeah!

Soli Deo Gloria!

Message from Writer

"You write so beautifully. Your mind must be a terrible place."
Always on the lookout for tragic backstories and broken characters. :D

I've got an ongoing series called Stereo Tropes Co.! Where story tropes run amuck!
Search up "Stereo Tropes Co." to find the pieces.
If you want to read them in order, follow the numbers in the titles :)

Why I Hate My Job and Am Currently Sprawled on the Floor | Stereo Tropes Co. (7) | Writing Streak Week 1 Day 5

July 22, 2020

FREE WRITING

18

​As a valued employee here at Stereo Tropes Co., your opinions matter to us*, so please take the time to give us some feedback on how we can enhance your experience:
  1. So you want feedback? I'll give you feedback in the form of a pretty list that you can stare at all day while I'm suffering away in my office. My favorite swivel chair is broken. Someone stole my pencils (I'm writing this with a pen shaped like a unicorn). The sun is pouring into the room making it feel like a SAUNA in here, and right now I can't even find the strength to sit up so I'm just lying on the carpet, waiting for heat stroke to take me. 
  2. I'd like to request a personal A/C unit in here. 
  3. Also. Can you please make sure the drinks dispenser in the lounge room is always stocked with pineapple juice? I literally almost died on my way home the other day because I did not have my necessary amount of heavenly sunshine liquid.
  4. And another thing. Why am always the one cleaning up your messes? I have enough to worry about with angry customers and answering complaints. Well how about you answer one of MY complaints for ONCE. Your security SUCKS. Your production line is out of whack. Your products more often than not either try to take over the world or ride around on vacuums when the janitor isn't looking (I can still hear the maniacal laughing of those Impish Creatures).
  5. This is why I hate my job. You think because I'm in customer service that I can be the fairy godmother to all your problems, which I don't blame you for, since I am pretty amazing, and your last Fairy Godmother product turned Prince Charming into a pumpkin and he became someone's jack o' lantern for Halloween.
  6. Yeah, news flash, the customer wasn't happy about that, and guess who had to deal with it. ME. 
  7. All I'm saying is, take some responsibility! Or maybe give me another coworker here in my department! A less annoying one at least. Print insults my choice of clothing so obviously his opinion should not count. 
  8. Speaking of annoying coworkers, maybe consider an upgrade in staff. I mean, seriously, who do you have working in those factories, first-grade dropouts? And no wonder I've never seen the Health and Safety Inspector around the office, he's probably too ashamed to show his idiotic face!
  9. Unless there is no Health and Safety Inspector. In that case, that explains a lot. 
  10. I'm tired. I'm thirsty. I'm dying. 
  11. And no, I didn't accidentally drink any Melodrama Potion. A man can only take so much ranting and venting in a day. Think of my mental and emotional health! 
  12. It's not just from customers! No one here tends to believe me! They always talk about how I'm too over-the-top, and I think everything's a joke, and I'm just a dumb guy with dumb luck who's made it this far because the universe likes a good laugh once in a while. 
  13. Well I am NOT. I tried SO HARD when I first arrived here, to be the perfect employee: I was calm when customers called. I kept my office organized and tidy. I never panicked in stressful situations and read through every manual on the shelf so that I would know how to handle a malfunction. 
  14. And OH! So NOW when a sentient ball of goop is ravaging the city or when Plott goes crazy and locks Prose and I up in his basement, I'M the one who has to FIX everything.
  15. And I DO. And what do I get for it!?
  16. THIS FLIPPIN' UNICORN PEN. 
  17. Now you may be thinking: "Thinker is only acting like this because Prose is on PTO and has nothing better to do with his life, so he picked up a survey from a year ago that he never filled out, and is using this as a mini therapy session because he has unchecked emotional baggage from his past." 
  18. And while that second half may be partially true, the first half isn't! I DO have better things to do with my life, I'm just...deciding not to. Look at that willpower. 
  19. Well I won't be a pushover anymore! I am taking a stand! 
  20. So clean up your act and maybe I'll consider cleaning up all the disasters your products inevitably get in to!

*your opinions only matter if they're the same as ours. Always read the small print.

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  • July 22, 2020 - 10:27pm (Now Viewing)

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10 Comments
  • mirkat

    haHaAHHahaAHhhaAhhahahaAhahhhAHhHa gosh, this. oh thinker..... lol and the unicorn pen and his heavenly golden sunshine liquid and his sheer "willpower". i am in love with this series!!!!!!!!! <3


    28 days ago
  • Writing4Life

    Ahhhhh I love this so much!


    4 months ago
  • Writing4Life

    (oooh i'm going put Soli Deo Gloria on my profile! I'm a Christian too :D)


    4 months ago
  • Bookworm101

    I have been reading all of these and I can't believe I haven't seen them before! They're so funny! I love them. Keep writing. :D


    4 months ago
  • RemovedUser1

    I just read through this again because it’s so funnyXD


    4 months ago
  • RemovedUser1

    I was literally LOLing when I read this!! I love the line “THIS FLIPPIN’ UNICORN PEN.” These are so amazing.
    PS My mom said you should write a Stereo Tropes book:). I told her about these(because they’re so funny) and that’s what she said:).


    4 months ago
  • ek503

    " I DO have better things to do with my life, I'm just...deciding not to. Look at that willpower. "
    haHA these pieces are awesome


    4 months ago
  • 2am Ghost

    Honestly, your Stereo Tropes Co. stories are the only thing I keep coming back here for- they’re flippin’ incredible and humorous :’) Btw WtW admins took down my piece- which was crossed a line for me- so I won’t really be active anymore, but I’ll log on every once in a while to check up on Stereo Tropes. I’ll miss you most because I’ve never really met someone who wrote in the same way I have, and shared the same sense of humor. You’re an amazing writer, and I hope you continue to grow Stereo Tropes Co.; it’s a really amazing series. :D


    4 months ago
  • outoftheblue

    i love love love stereo tropes. the day this series ends,,,,,


    4 months ago
  • birthdaycandles

    Ah, “always read the small print” that got me at the end :(


    4 months ago