" As a writer
you try to listen
to what others
aren't saying...
and write about
the silence "
- N.R. Heart

Message to Readers

1 day behind, but I would never expect less from me :)

Writing Streak, Week 1 [1]

July 14, 2020

7 things I wish I had written down before you found me;

[1] My body no longer feels like its in the present. Always two seconds in the past, lagging, waiting to be left behind between dawn and dusk of a repeated day. Hiding in your sighs as you sleep, my body waits in the shadows to be noticed. 
[2] Your towel is a lighter colour. I hadn’t noticed, but its paler now. I wonder how long its been on the floor, or why I’m such a coward to pick it up. I leave it there, surrounded by your footprints and hair, and wonder how long your shadow has been haunting my apartment.
[3] My alarm clocks has been dead for 3 weeks. I don’t have the energy to fix it, knowing you would have if you were here. These days I barely have the energy to wake up, knowing that my left side grows colder, and my days grow longer. My dead alarm doesn’t bother me now, and I bask in the silence.
[4] Regret taints my future, and I no longer feel the need to imagine the stale dream of potential.
[5] My mouth had molded against yours. Grown with your chapped lips and biting teeth. They sit awkwardly now, and I don’t know what to do with them. Speaking doesn’t quite fit ok anymore, and words feel like invaders in my own mouth. I would say I wish I had it back now, the use of my tongue, and yet I do not know what I would do with it now.
[6] How do I stop the shaking in my pen? The ink jumps from the page, arguing against the words I wish to write. My fingers know something I don’t, I know they do – they twitch on certain letters and break through the paper at others. I wish they would tell me, for I feel so blind.
[7] I wish you hadn’t ran. I feel the leash choking me, pulling me somewhere I don’t want to be. I’ll catch up soon, I’m sure of it, and maybe ill hear your laugh again.


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  • July 14, 2020 - 6:18am (Now Viewing)

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