avoiding the big bang

United States

writes abt: books, cats, and self-deprecation
anti -isms and -phobias

Message from Writer

the argument goes something like this:

"i refuse to prove i exist," says god, "for proof denies faith and without faith i am nothing."

"but," says man, "the babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn't it? it could not have evolved by chance. it proves you exist, so therefore, by your own logic, you don't."

"oh, i hadn't thought of that," says god, and promptly vanishes in a puff of logic.

"oh, that was easy," says man, and for an encore goes on to prove that black is white and gets himself killed at the next pedestrian crossing.

Business Negotiations

July 4, 2020

FREE WRITING

16
    My mom is afraid of going to the carwash.  Our old van sat around for over a year collecting dust and pollen and bird poop and rainwater gunk.  If you opened the passenger side door your hand would turn toffee-brown.  The windshield sagged under a vignette of old who-knew-what.
    She asked me to scrub down the car with a hose and a sponge on hands and knees.  I was indignant until she offered payment.
    “How much?”
    “How about you make an offer and I’ll tell you whether or not I accept it?”
    I thought for a while.  My lips worked uncertainly around heavy numbers.  “Ten dollars?”
    “You can go as high as you want, you know.”
    “… Fifteen dollars?”  That felt unfair.  “Thirteen dollars?  Twelve dollars?  I don't know.  Ten is fine.”
    The job sat around not being done.  Two weeks later Mom approached me again.
    “Fifty dollars if you do it on Thursday.”
    I did it on Thursday.

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8 Comments
  • Deleted User

    Replying: no, I thought I said on Prose that WTW deleted my account for me?


    about 1 year ago
  • erin!

    replying: hey! i took down "a story about change" because i wasn't the happiest with it but the fact that you liked it so much has me considering republishing it!


    about 1 year ago
  • erin!

    replying: i'm so glad you also hate olives! as for the piece, my brother once paid me 80(!) dollars to capture a spider that was lurking in his room. i don't love bugs, but you best believe i became an exterminator that day.


    about 1 year ago
  • books4life

    Love! Hahahaha totally relate :)


    about 1 year ago
  • Deleted User

    Great piece!


    about 1 year ago
  • Spade

    I don't know if I'd wash the car, even for fifty bucks. I hate cleaning. My parents offered to pay me for cleaning around the house (and that's in ac) but I don't (unless they threaten me with electronics).


    about 1 year ago
  • ineffable

    I really enjoyed your narrative voice in this. It's fresh and makes me wanna read more.


    about 1 year ago
  • Busssy.Beee

    It's hilarious how money drives our actions... I'm the same.


    about 1 year ago