rainandsonder

United States

"the audience is only safe when the story isn't about them."

they/them - probably listening to sufjan stevens

Message from Writer

an important piece by outoftheblue- https://bit.ly/3dBxv5r

black lives matter & pride is over but the fight for lgbt+ rights is year round.

bio quote is from the magnus archives

no story should be allowed to end like that

July 1, 2020

FREE WRITING

15
and the past is still a wasp's nest buzzing overhead, the discordant taste of blood creeping into your mouth sometimes like it thought you wouldn't notice. when you stand still for too long, your knees start to buckle of their own accord. it's better to keep moving, to try desperately not to think of your bones as brittle bridges beginning to crack at the foundations. there is a freedom in falling apart, and it is not a freedom that you can pay the price for.

sometimes you feel that you were already meant to be in the grave. sometimes when you stand in the courtyard, the sky looks stone and frozen as a grave anyway. even the air has started to smell like something acrid and earthy, and you know how your story ends; your life is a book you read once several years ago. 

at night, you hear his voice: that's horrible. no story should ever be allowed to end like that. yes, but so many do. usually when you fall in love, it’s never completely about them. it’s a hostile love that resents the space it occupies in your heart and wants to do anything to hurt you. never with him.

still, it’s too late now, but then, of course, a happy ending was never going to be an option for someone like you. 
 
quick explanation: this one isn’t about me or my own personal experiences, i just finished a show recently and i’m once again frustrated at all the angst and hardship and sad endings that gay characters always seem to endure. mostly unrevised and unedited, this isn’t my best work but i felt like getting it out of my brain. 

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  • July 1, 2020 - 5:50pm (Now Viewing)

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6 Comments
  • Eblinn

    (reply) thanks for the comment and for the constructive criticism, I really appreciate it :)


    5 months ago
  • erin!

    replying: hey! thanks for the kind words; i'm actually not from california and was referring to the atlantic ocean, but i appreciate your comments all the same. will definitely be keeping up with your writing, your words are so poignant and beautiful.


    5 months ago
  • V-Poinsettia (V-Rose) #holidayvibes

    Replying: Thank you for your comment on my piece. I was not trying to speak above the voices, I was just trying to say, that hey, just because we don't agree, why do people have to shove me down. The person I was arguing with has been trying to shove me down for a long time and for a few years, I was unable to distance myself from her. The comment or lines about white people enslaving others was based on the fact that she accused me of being that person and those my people when we have the same kind of skin and such. I feel attacked as a person because I had a different opinion. I'm sorry if it came off differently and, if you could, please let me know what I can fix. Again, thank you for your comment. I understand that these were not personal attacks but it was a pice that was personal to me. I was just trying to say how she made me feel


    5 months ago
  • amaryllis

    Ahh the line " your life is a book you read once several years ago" really hit home, especially since I was just discussing with someone whether art is a reflection of life or life is an imitation of art! Also, your username is gorgeous :))


    5 months ago
  • sunny.v

    ugh, this was gorgeous. “ it’s a hostile love that resents the space it occupies in your heart and wants to do anything to hurt you. never with him. ” and yes, your footnotes! gay characters always get the short end of the stick, whether it be “bury your gays” or getting swept aside or being villainized. preach, honestly, it angers me to no end. anyways: this piece embodies your anger at this so well! lovely!


    5 months ago
  • fatpanda

    ik you said that this wasn't your best work, but i really, really like this piece.
    "it's better to keep moving, to try desperately not to think of your bones as brittle bridges beginning to crack at the foundations." is masterfully written, i feel like it has so much depth and power to it, this line in itself lays down the foundation for the rest of the piece. will definitely come back to this!


    5 months ago