Christy Wisdom

United States

Hello people! What to say? I'm a Christian girl. I like to write. I write tons of poetry, some short stories, and other things.
God bless you!
Shouganai
-I wish I could speak every single language, wouldn't that be cool ?

Message from Writer

You can be nostalgic for a place you've never been if you've been there in your imagination.

strokes of paint on canvas/those are my words on a page/watch as the ink blots drawn from the depths of my mind/stain papers as they grow yellow with age/wonder if they will live forever/in the imagination and thoughts of someone/for sometimes you'll find if the words are important/blotting them out is not easily done

Thank you to all who have supported me, and feedback is always welcome!
Also, if you comment on a piece of mine, I will generally respond to it at some point.

chocolate-eyed daughter of seven #childofyournation

June 28, 2020

FREE WRITING

7


i am the child of big families/aunt and uncle alike scattered to the wind/go forth and multiply/mama, how could they tell you that your five children are your selfishness/that we are overpopulation, nothing else/mama, do they wish i was never born?/how could they tell po-po that you and her siblings are too many/too many sons and daughters and uncles and aunts/90 members on even just one side of my family, God has been good to us/i ask of whoever said this to my mama/whoever said this to my po-po/what possessed you to insult a mother and her mother and the children that each had/be careful with what you say/sons and daughters will defend a mother vehemently/will go to the ends of the earth for her/how dare you say that to my mama/watch your step/who told you to take the names of my siblings and aunts and uncles and spit upon them/seven is the number of completeness/seven is my mom and dad, my four siblings, me/seven is my grandpa and my po-po's children/some say 7 is a symbol of God's work/who are you to number our family and sneer "overabundance"/Father, help me forgive them for their slanderous words/as often as i am insulted, forgive them 7 times 70/seven is the number of completeness

i am the little girl of the chimera/quarter chinese/parts german and irish-scottish/countless fractions of other countries, faded with time/look in the mirror/know the shards are there/see the robustness of german heritage in my visage/little quarter-girl, wouldn't know she had it in her/the asian genes didn't go to me/rich dark brown is all i have/i am beautiful amalgamation/hybrid tree/and yet i cling to my chinese roots like/firefly, don't go/cup it in my palm/po-po is cantonese for grandma/do-po is my chinese great-grandma's made-up term/use it anyways/do-po i wish you had lived just a little longer/the lightning-bug flew off into the forest/chase it/find the family recipes, make the cha-sieu and bulgoki/dad says i got the asian tastebuds, after all/wait all year for po-po's birthday and dim-sum brunch/thank you for the red envelope/look for recipes online to quell the hunger/for spices that make me homesick/for a country that i've never known/kokuho rice, white and fluffy/drizzle with soysauce and ginger and sriracha/sip jasmine tea and munch on fortune cookies/lazy susan shares the custard pies among the round table members/bring us all together/firefly hovers/blinking/just out of reach/soak up culture and traditions as i read Joy Luck Club/wish that i knew how to make dumplings/wish that i knew mandarin or cantonese/Lord, would you bless me with the gift of tongues/so that my native-speaking tongue could pronounce foreign ancestral words?

i am the daughter of sunday morning church service/let the worship permeate my soul/God has been good to my family/po-po is married to a pastor/both of them and all their children, devout Christians/love God in the midst of cancer and tribulations/even as po-po lay in a hospital bed/she never forgot Jesus/and how could i not believe?/see how God has worked in my life/recount how when the youngest in my family almost died the day he was born/God woke up grandpa and told him to pray/choked flower became bright and lively/say amen, praise the Lord/saved since 7/taught about God for all my life/will serve Him till my heart stops beating/hope in Him when the world is hopeless/and it is well with my soul/worry for po-po's health/Lord, don't let her get coronavirus/it is well with my soul/watch the country panic and fear/watch the numbers climb up, up, up/it is well with my soul/pray and memorize Bible verses/take the words to heart, steep my soul in them/pray without ceasing/let your requests be made known to Him/Lord, i'm tired/Lord, my heart is heavy/God, my country needs saving/why does it swim away from the lifeline/drowning in its own mistakes/protect the missionaries, Father/protect my family, Father/but above all else/Thy will be done/and it is well with me

i am the baby born of loving glances/of midnight conversations and a listening ear/of a family who finds pleasure in our own company/and late-night movies and marco polo in the pool/i am my mama's girl, my dad's daughter/shaped by the careful hands of my parents/of my father/a great man, devout and gentle/caring and protective of his family/infinitely patient/(see how he is worthy of respect/some men in this world may be terrible/but he is not one of them) of my mother/who teaches me how to be a godly woman/(witness my love for her and all that she does/see her wisdom and godliness/know that she has raised me/a homeschooling stay-at-home mom/witness why i will not stand for insults to her)/i am the baby born of prayers and hugs/i am sister, i am friend/i am God's child/with values instilled in my heart/and crystallized in the dark chocolate eyes i got from my mama/so when the mirror asks as it gazes upon the/smudged ink and blurred lines of my identity/"who are you?"/i respond/"i am me."
Woo, that took me forever to write :) This was really fun. I don't know if I did it right, but that's okay I guess. My mom is half-Chinese, and my po-po is full Chinese.  The Chinese part of my heritage, being a full quarter (I have no idea how German, Irish-Scottish, etc. I am), is honestly the one that I connect with the most. It's probably more prevalent in my life than the others, although it's still not very prevalent. I get a very peculiar kind of homesickness and interest in reading people's pieces or stories that include some part of the culture or the language, because I know next to nothing about it. I wish I did. But I make do with what I know. The idea of the piece stems from how heritage isn't as big of an explainable part of my identity, because it's not very clear-cut. I don't have a lot of recognizably Chinese, Irish-Scottish, or German things about me or my lifestyle. I consider myself Asian-American, but you wouldn't be able to see it just by looking at me. Thus, a lot of my identity comes from my religion and my family and my parents. And yet, I still search for those little tidbits of Chinese that I can find.

The idea behind the title is that despite the fact that my sense of identity is rooted in a lot of things, my heritage, my family, my ideals, my religion, whatever else, the shards of the mirror still come together to form me. When complete, they are who I am. A chimera, a person longing for connection to her heritage, the daughter of big families and big hugs.

:D Hope you enjoyed the piece! I sure enjoyed writing it. 

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3 Comments
  • Christy Wisdom

    Thank you so much :D


    5 months ago
  • birthdaycandles

    Ah what a beautiful exploration of your heritage, I thoroughly enjoyed reading it :) my favourite line is “I am beautiful amalgamation”


    5 months ago
  • sunny.v

    it’s so cool to see you talk about 7, because it’s a lucky number for me as well! thank you so much for showing me your world—the quarter Chinese part was a really interesting facet! “ wish that i knew how to make dumplings/wish that i knew mandarin or cantonese/Lord, would you bless me with the gift of tongues/so that my native-speaking tongue could pronounce foreign ancestral words? ” this was soooo relatable and so beautiful. i love your description of the lazy Susan tables—just gorgeous. i enjoyed reading this so much, it was delightful to see your thoughts and feelings! especially with religion! thank you so so so much for participating, I’m honored to have you in this challenge! i can’t thank you enough for showing me your world—it’s gorgeous. thank you, and I wish you luck in your journey of self discovery! <3 <3


    5 months ago