Tho Nguyen

United States

cali | her | 15
an aspiring poet
trying to find inspiration in a monochromatic world
est. june 23, 2020

Message from Writer

find me on prose

cradle of stars

September 20, 2020

FREE WRITING

9
we slept under a cradle of stars,
moonlight eyes and silken hair and
not a care in the world

a quiet repose from our clockwork lives,
stillness baring her guttural heartbeat, thumping
underneath a shirt of grass
the yearning croaks of grasshoppers and
smells of calm.

we wanted to believe we were lost, shipwrecked
finally separated from the normal we had longed to cast away
always reaching, always climbing the endless ladder
listlessly watching
hectic days give way to hollow nights,
as blurry eyes search through clouded windows
searching for all that slipped past our fingers

but the earth has always been, will always be
a primordial mother waiting for the prodigal son to return, riches to rags
folded in her embrace, under a blanket of wildflowers and
a cradle of stars.

 

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  • September 20, 2020 - 3:50pm (Now Viewing)

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4 Comments
  • Syzygy (#words) (J.A.M)

    This is gorgeous! <3


    5 months ago
  • Anne Blackwood

    Ack this is so wondrous. I love it so much. I feel like it would be a disgrace to not comment more about this amazing piece, but Dmoral and landofstories kind beat me to it. *shrugs* Great work.


    5 months ago
  • Dmoral

    so the flow in that first stanza was effortless and immediately fell in love with the soft feel of everything.

    "hectic days give way to hollow nights, / as blurry eyes search through clouded windows / searching for all that slipped past our fingers"
    favorite lines! i love how slow and gentle this is, i felt as though i the transition was this imagery was slipping through my fingers carelessly and i couldn't quite hold on to it. and that's why i love it so much.

    "but the earth has always been, will always be"
    the blunt, direct, and "fate" feel of this is amazing, i enjoyed how you started this stanza like this, clam but also getting to the point.

    starting with "We slept under a cradle of stars," and ending with "folded in her embrace, under a blanket of wildflowers and / a cradle of stars." was brilliant! the foreshadowing effect and circling ending, the realization afterward-gosh, that was amazing. truly, talent shown by a wonderful writer.

    afternote: "a primordial mother waiting for the prodigal son to return, riches to rags"
    i had to go back to this line, 'cause i just want to run my fingers over it. it's amazing and i complete i didn't mention it until now. the fiction and irony at the end of the line, so so so good!


    5 months ago
  • Landofstories

    GAHHH THIS IS STUNNING ANG GORGEOUS AND ETHEREAL AND BEAUTIFUL AND A THOUSAND OTHER WORDS, the amount I need to convey how amazing this piece is! ahhhhh ohmygosh!!! I'm speechless, also I'm glad to see another post by you! I saw one of your pieces and absolutely loved it!!


    5 months ago