elliem

Canada

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I joined on March 30th, 2020 :)

I'm happy to do reviews if anyone needs/wants one! I take time with and put thought into my reviews so keep in mind that they may take a while :)

You Charm the Watchers (TW: anxiety)

June 30, 2020

FREE WRITING

8
     You charm the watchers
    with your hazel eyes flecked with liquid gold,
    with your butterscotch laugh
    and faded overalls
    and the way you just don't care.

    I care
    My knuckles turn white
    because I clutch my backpack strap so hard
    I stare at the floor
    which has suddenly become very interesting
    (it always does when they're whispering about me)


    You charm the watchers
   with those ringed glasses
    that have the thin, silver frames
    and the cherry lollipop pressed against your lips.

    You make it look so easy
    Aren't you suffering inside?
    Or is that just another perfect thing about you
    In your world of yellow-rain boots
    and freshly-baked cookies
    And I am left in the thunderstorm,
    banging at the window and shrieking
    as the wind tears my skin and pulls at my hair


    You charm the watchers
    with your meticulous, detailed notes,
    with your chestnut hair pulled up in a messy bun,
    with your "it's not a big deal".

    It's a big deal
    It's a b
i g d e a l
    It's a big d
                         e
                             a
                                            l                
    because I blink at the blue colours
    I like blue
    (It helps me feel better on the dark days,
    which come in waves)
    "But you're so happy, aren't you?"
    Not when the people that love me have left


    You charm the watchers
    with your weekend parties
    where you drink until the room spins
    and expect people like me to catch you

    People like me,
    because you treat us like the supporting roles
    in your blockbuster movies
    (I'm tired of being a prop)
    it's all about you, in your eyes
    though sometimes I have to realize

    
You charm the watchers
    But when the watchers are gone,
    you tuck your head into your knees
    and rock back and forth
    and cry

    just like me
   i guess we're not so different after all
    the watchers don't like me as much;
    they only like their daily program
    (you)
    but maybe if you will take my hand,
    I will guide you through this dangerous world
    of too-bright lights and snakes which speak of me behind my back
    and the things which I have to tap several times
    to ensure that nobody will die today


    You charm the watchers
    and I'm sorry you do
    because it hurts you on the inside

    I think it hurts us all,
    so maybe if we hurt together
    the dark-day wave will pass
    and the watchers will leave you alone
    and we can be
    happy


    You charm the watchers
 
I guess this is a poem about my anxiety and mental health and how the "popular" people in my grade pretend like I am their loyal follower when in reality they obviously face the same fears that I do. Whoops.

I hope you have a good night/day! <3

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  • June 30, 2020 - 3:38pm (Now Viewing)

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5 Comments
  • spurtsofdarkness

    Replying: Oh my god thank you so much! I’ve been kind of down lately, since one of my recents flopped (i liked it so much!), and i was just wondering if anyone would read this. Thanks so much!!! Also, I don’t know Shakespearean english, I just used a cheap translator *shrugs* *facepalms* Thanks again :D


    5 months ago
  • batman_is_a_cracker

    The also-artists community challenge has begun! I hope you have fun :)
    https://writetheworld.com/groups/1/shared/177129/version/352855


    5 months ago
  • Anne Blackwood

    *jaw drops* *stays that way* *claps* *cries* *wishes i could comment as well as chrys*


    5 months ago
  • chrysanthemums&ink

    oh i love this. the rather 'subversive' take on the ''popular'' people in your grade, how you describe your pain and describe the ones who 'charm the watchers' and how 'perfect' they are. then the 9th stanza hits and wow i really wasn't expecting for you to start sympathizing with those poor people and offering a hand to them in solidarity. admitting that they're not that different from you and extending an offer of help. a scintilla of hope. it was exactly what i needed tonight, thank you for writing this <3


    5 months ago
  • batman_is_a_cracker

    oOF This piece do be hittin different. AMAZING job. I adore the descriptions. Reading this piece was like eating a spoonful cereal. (Interpret that however you like.)


    5 months ago