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Message from Writer


My message to the gifted young writers of Write the World:
Don’t let anyone dictate your words.

The Illusion Of Control | Chapter 5, Snow's Garden

June 9, 2020


Chapter 5
Snow's Garden

The walk to the garden
is a short one.
I learned the pathway
to my mother's garden
in my infant years.
I know it
like the back of my hand.
From the old tapestry
to the weathered carpeting.
Through the arch
where the wisteria petals flow down
during the springtime.

I find my mother
where I always find her;
sitting on a bench,
eyes closed,
hands folded in her lap.

I take a breath
inhaling the sweet scent
of the flowers 
my mother painstakingly planted
and cared for.
One by one
like they were each
a child of hers.

“I was so worried.”
She keeps her eyes closed
but holds out her arms
for me.

I come to her
like I always do:
reaching out
and stumbling over myself
into her embrace.

She strokes her hand 
through my hair.
I let out a whimper,
a sob follows shortly after.

“It’s alright. Let it out.”
She coos.

I am a grown man.
I’m not ashamed to admit
that I love my mother
and being held by her
is one of the greatest comforts
on this earth.
She never fails
to calm my rage,
my anguish,
my sadness,
my hopelessness.

“Is it the wedding?
Is it too soon?
Do you need more time?
To get to know her?
Deirdre is a beautiful girl,
I’m sure you’ve noticed for yourself.
Forgive me, my love,
I just don’t understand
your hesitation.
Help me understand.”

I self-indulgently sink into her
for just a moment
before pulling from her embrace.
She cuts off the tear-tracks on my cheeks
with a swipe of her delicate hand.

“It’s nothing.”

My mother smiles
It’s different from Noah’s smile,
it’s assured and understanding
and laced with the kind of love
only a mother can show.

“I will never know
how you can cry your heart out
and claim the tears you shed
were nothing.
Your feelings are real
and valid
and they have value.
Yet you call them nothing.”

That almost makes me cry again.
I rub my eyes stubbornly.

“Really, mother,
it’s nothing of great importance.
I was just out for a walk this morning
and you know how pollen makes my eyes water.”

She gives me a look that says:
Silly boy.
I’ll indulge you
for now
but one day
I’ll force you to talk.

She sighs.
“Whatever you say, my dear.”
Here's where to find Chapter One, The Crack of DawnChapter Two, Electric BoogalooChapter Three, Deirdre, and Chapter Four, Endless Internal Lamenting
I hope you enjoy reading my work in progress.


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  • June 9, 2020 - 4:44pm (Now Viewing)

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    aw, mom. I thought that she was going to be a conniving queen, but I like this wisteria clothed comforter so much better <3

    3 months ago
  • Eremurus

    While I was reading I thought, I'll note those lines in the comments, elliem got to it first. They create this wonderful image in my head :)

    3 months ago
  • Busssy.Beee

    yesss, with elliem, i love those lines too. but, like, what's wrong with Deirdre? were they forced together? i hope to find answers soon.....

    3 months ago
  • elliem

    "From the old tapestry
    to the weathered carpeting.
    Through the arch
    where the wisteria petals flow down
    during the springtime."

    ^^ This line. THIS. LINE. It's so gorgeous!! Also, I LOVE Henry's healthy masculinity. His mother seems really sweet and motherly and the garden has *really* nice aesthetics. Arguably my favourite chapter so far! (Though it's hard to choose.)

    8 months ago