United Arab Emirates

to love or to not love

avatar: self portrait as a tehuana by frida kahlo

(riley, you go girl!)

Message from Writer

when i'm done with school i'll cut off all my hair and dye it green and wear only late-victorian stuff.

nolite te bastardes carborundorum

reading to my little brother one night

June 1, 2020


three, tall, stoic, lucky bamboos stand against the wall
riddled with amber wounds now
feng shui fettered somewhere in its pose

'lucky bum' you call them
you and the sliver of baby fat 
under your chin
that took me back to a night some months ago

it was bedtime
our thoughts encased in the dreary dampness
of the night
a small body beside mine 
and strawberry toothpaste breath
on the hard-bound walls of the fairytale book
'there was a boy who lived with his mother' and so on
my voice, its frilly frock and all
lost somewhere in the brambles of your disinterest.

'so you will be the first to die?'
you say suddenly, your eyes still fixed on the page,
your lips still pursed
'and i will die many years after you?'

my surprise is quiet,
you are young-and-unwise-y
childish thrall in my 
'yes, i will die first'

and suddenly the night gains color
my smirk hangs limp in the air
yes, yes, yes
we lie like that in the quiet
till your fingers find mine
a wet kiss on my chin
'i wish we could die together'
you whisper to yourself

and in that low lamp light
i loved your uneven haircut
and cavity-clad teeth
a little more

but i can see thar your mind has already wandered
that the moment is already lost
you whine that you're hungry
and i get up to fix you something.
my brother also thinks that god lives in our stomachs and that there is an angel at each shoulder telling you what to do.


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  • June 1, 2020 - 5:46am (Now Viewing)

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  • sunny.v

    reply: aw thanks dude <3 and sadly, in my country, things are the exact same. it’s always “but what was she wearing?” i got fed up with that culture of being hung up on women’s clothes so, i mean, yep. thanks for your sweet comments!!

    11 months ago
  • sunny.v

    awghhh this is just so sweet. you make the most domestic little exchange so, so poignant. wow. i’m in love with your descriptions!

    11 months ago
  • Salvador Kent

    This is a fantastic poem, I really really feel it it's great.

    P.s thanks for all the lovely comments on my profile :)

    12 months ago
  • Ahsan Nizaam

    Good luck hiding your homework. Looks like he's too cool to leave it alone. I love your work and how your underlying theme works it's magic. It's beautiful

    12 months ago
  • mia_:)

    This is so sweet and well-written! It was such a special moment, but also seemed so ordinary at the same time, thanks to descriptions like "strawberry toothpaste breath." I really loved this piece!!! :)

    12 months ago
  • outoftheblue

    i really love the overall mood of this poem. it's kind of nostalgic and reminiscent for things i haven't been through.

    12 months ago
  • PureHeart

    this is so endearing and well-written!

    12 months ago