mia_:)
United States
she/her | i come & go
est. march 5, 2020
Message to Readers
another angsty failed love story! enjoy!!!
the science of caving in #rollthedice4
Written By: mia_:)
June 11, 2020
FREE WRITING
(i)
collapsible stars.
velvet supernovas folded into squares and tucked into coat pocket lining for safe keeping. not flowers, but petals; individual elements spiraling into existence and out of it with equal subtlety.
the inky sky dotted with pinpricks of light is all a ruse, a ghost of what used to be.
if all stars had fallen from the heavens and caved in like i'm caving for you, we wouldn't know.
supernovas remain secret for years, as i've tucked away my feelings inside my jacket lining. but you can never know. or everything would fall apart.
(ii)
upset equilibrium.
you tear at my hull, knock at the portholes in my starboard. always asking something of me.
it's too much to maintain. you press up against me from all angles, leaving me no choice but to crumple inward.
hydrostatic pressure, they say. osmosis and diffusion, they say.
i'm alive, i whisper, but no one can hear me. for i am nothing without you, and that is what i was afraid of.
(iii)
you crushed me. shattered me. you beg for forgiveness, toss casual promises at my feet, but i turn my face to the breeze.
i won't cave in. you can't make me implode that easily.
supernovas are beautiful things, but they leave voids in their place, sucking others into their grief. you won't get that satisfaction. and i don't want to hurt you anymore.
hold pressure to stop the bleeding, they said. the wound can't heal unless you hold pressure.
but i've been holding
and holding
and holding and still
it stings. i bleed. i haven't healed.
will i ever?
but, the only way to stop collapse is to relieve the external tension, the stuff threatening my collapse.
you. you won't rupture my sail, blow holes in my stern.
i won't be a fading wound of light, miles away from those i love. i won't.
which means letting go. you'll sail your ship; i'll sail mine.
but the collapsible stars in my coat pocket remind me
of the traps that you set and i stumbled into.
and i thrive in your absence.
and you implode in mine.
Footnotes
velvet, petal, breeze
16 Comments
chrysanthemums&ink
rereading this and wow, you totally deserved the win! congratulations! <33
Anne Blackwood
Replying: Thanks, buddy. My mom has surprisingly not really been in any pain, so that's awesome. It's just hard to move with your leg in a freaking gigantic cast XD.
elliem
This is so gorgeous Mia! Sorry I didn't see this earlier. Thanks for entering and good luck! <3
inkandstars
review on the way!
The Campbell's Kid
Replying: Sure! You can enter as many prompts as you want! :)
delete
Mia, I’m absolutely blown away! You’re so intelligent and talent and just seeing you thrust all of it into your poem for Ellie’s contest just shows all of the hard work that you’ve put into this piece! This is just a work of art. ‘The collapsible stars in my coat pocket remind of the traps that you set and I stumbled into’ - how did you come up with that? That’s so artistic and creative. This particularly line makes me think at how we can be fooled by things or people that seem pretty or good, but are actually rotten and ugly- a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Great symbolism and I would love to see this piece published for real one day. X
Anne Blackwood
"I can't spend my whole life dreaming / though that's all I seem inclined to do"
"I need space and fresh air / let them laugh in my face I don't care"
THANK you for reminding me of that song yesterday.
Anne Blackwood
Replying: Aw ilysm thank you
Tushar Mandhan
This is so good! Like next level good (sorry for old school vocabulary) You're a gem!<3
joella
miaaaa this is amazing!!!! I feel like I can’t properly compliment this because I’m delirious with exhaustion but wowww
Anne Blackwood
Replying: Oh. My. GOSH. How did I not think of that song already? You're a genius! I'm gonna so listen to it on repeat.
And_The_Stars_Laughed
Yes yes yes!!!!! This is beautiful!!! I love how you use the symbolism of supernovas to convey implosion in this piece, I'm obsessed with all things outer space! :) Awesome job!!!
sunny.v
MIA!!! THIS WAS GORGEOUS!! the way the formatting/structure looks nearing the end is like everything’s collapsing/falling apart! omg and your voice...it’s so vivid! “ i'm alive, i whisper, but no one can hear me. for i am nothing without you, and that is what i was afraid of. ” and (i) has NO business being that pretty. this is stunning ;-;
ps thank you for the love teehee <3
Anne Blackwood
Thanks so much for showing me some love on my older stuff <3
Stone of Jade
this is absolutely breathtaking! The imagery used is so powerful and so captivating. I can't even find the words to describe how beautiful this is!
Anne Blackwood
I um forgot to breathe for most of this poem. It basically punched me in the throat (nope not the stomach). Usually that happens when I relate to a piece, but this one is so well written it didn't matter that I had no experience with the subject. I'd reference my favorite lines, but that would just end in me pasting in the whole piece. I am utterly blown away.