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Just stop looking at me that way!

May 22, 2020


Oh, but oh, but oh, that's just so weird - stop it - but - stop looking at stop looking at me like that stop it please! stop it! please! Why should you look at me in such a way that I may but they are quite but no - but - no! oh please, let this all be over and I shall be back and home will be happy oh - oh - why must I go through - or I could say just say - oh! oh no! I can't do this - I could - but I won't I will not not do this I could but won't! I won't! But mind clear - but - don't think - and it would be such a life! that I would have and couldn't it be more than what I have now? couldn't it? oh please I must know this as I know everything but suddenly I don't know everything - don't think! - and the world is falling apart for me and I don't know what to say! oh! oh! Take a breath - take a breath. Take a breath. I will exit and but no! oh I couldn't just - what would I say? oh what? I'd have to think of something but I cannot think I cannot think I am trapped in my thoughts that won't think - think! - think! - no don't think! - no think! - what could be happening to me! it is so weird! stop it! stop looking at me that way - don't think! - do think! - stop it! Soon this will be over and I don't care I don't you will see and I will see because I don't care if you look at me like that I don't - don't think! - shouldn't think! - thinking will make me vulnerable! and that would make this nightmare come true even if it is already true I don't want it to be any truer than it has to be will you just stop! I don't want to but I can take you will you please leave me alone and stop! stop looking at me like that I can't take it can't take it stop! oh stop! stop it right now I don't want you near me even though I do - but I don't! do not and you and I will never - there's nothing we can do especially you maybe I could but you can't! so you can leave me here or I will leave you! which would you prefer? which? which? I say! Must we go on like this like this is so awful what is happening? I feel like I'm going to - don't think! - I must not think! - but the life might be so great so rich! and I am just rejecting it? no! no! yes! I must forget that this ever happened tomorrow and the day after tomorrow and forever on and the day will leave me - don't leave me! - do leave me! - just stop looking at me like that! I can't take it! stop doing that! or I'll never be able to make it out or should I just not make it out? and do I really want that badly to - no - yes! I must want to leave and make it out so that I may live a life free of whatever this feeling is oh the feeling! just get it away! One day I will look back maybe in three hundred years when I have been dead for eternity and say how foolish I was and know that the right decision was to say something and leave - say something and leave! - and it doesn't matter whether I did it or not but I will know and I know now that I will know one day but I don't know now! oh nothing makes since! nothing makes since anymore! Fine! I will stay at least a little but will you please - you're so convincing! irresistible! - please just stop looking like that! don't look at me like that! if you do then I will - I will what? the world will never be the same for me or anybody and I must not but I will at least for a little while but then no! no! no! oh just stop looking at me that way!


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  • May 22, 2020 - 11:57am (Now Viewing)

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