Madeline Harper

United Kingdom

Flute player
Writer
A bit of a science nerd ngl
Animal Lover
Plant Collector
Baker

Message from Writer

Please feel free to leave comments/criticisms, I haven’t been writing poetry for very long and I’m determined to improve!

My Mind Is Worth More Than My Body

May 17, 2020

FREE WRITING

7
Tactile silence reverberating through my ears.
The shower weeps in a hollow bathroom,
tears rolling down the drain.
My head can’t take it any longer.
 
Bleak rusting metal distorts my image
and I scream at a sobbing caricature of myself.
The wind knocks at the door,
begging me to let her in;
 
so I do. And I wonder why I expected to see him instead,
with the word sorry dangling on his lips
like his cigarettes, glowing without shame.
I hate that it was the only word he ever drew from mine.
 
Blink
and he’s still not there. I should’ve learnt by now.
He’s never here anymore, never was; just a shallow man 
whose mind was somewhere I could never find.
 
I step back into the shower and let
water cascade over my collaged skin
but never penetrating my inner museum,
the artefacts reserved for people like
 
him,
 
raw and rare and displayed behind glassy eyes.
My true self cannot be touched;
I’m precious, or so I thought.
Clearly my body is the only exhibit of any value.
 
Hours later I’m still filthy. Why wasn’t he satisfied?
Why did I offer him all of me and smile as he
picked me apart, choosing what he wanted to keep
and discarding the imperfections that bring me to life?
 
And I scrub and scrub but
the myriad of soapy bubbles just can’t
erase his erotic touch from my skin.
I’ll have to live with his fingerprints engrained into my thighs.
Edited and (hopefully) improved version of ‘Cannot Be Touched’ after reading a peer review by mia_:), I suck at thinking of titles so if anyone has any suggestions feel free to leave them in the comments!

Print

See History
  • May 17, 2020 - 2:01pm (Now Viewing)

Login or Signup to provide a comment.

8 Comments
  • ElsaRee

    STUNNING!!! I'm speechless!


    5 months ago
  • OpalDove

    My results are out! This is a really sad poem. I'm so sorry, but it's really great. Here's the link:

    https://writetheworld.com/groups/1/shared/168340/version/331634


    5 months ago
  • Julia V

    ...
    ^thats me at the moment. just frozen in shock. wow. wow.wow.wow.wow. this is just, OHEMGEE THIS AHMAZINGGG ITS JUST *chefs kiss* bravo. the rawness, the visual, the everything. the words you chose and everything in this is just amazing. youre amazing. please keep writing :)


    5 months ago
  • Madeline Harper

    Wow I really wasn’t expecting such a response, thank you so so much to everyone for all your lovely comments!


    5 months ago
  • Cressida

    This is such an amazingly authentic and raw poem. This is honestly one of the most authentic pieces I have read on this website, and your voice truly shines through the words you use! Your tone is impeccable! Everything is amazing, cannot rave enough.
    "Bleak rusting metal distorts my image / and I scream at a sobbing caricature of myself" Love the contrast between the screaming and the sobbing!
    And the second to last stanza? Absolutely gorgeous in a shattering, heart-breaking way. If you haven't been writing poetry for that long and this is you when you're NEW to it, then wow I'm speechless. Stunning piece!


    5 months ago
  • Anne Blackwood

    Oh my gosh, this is mind-bogglingly stunning. I have no words.


    5 months ago
  • mia_:)

    AAAAAAAAAHH! This is AMAZING! Nothing makes me happier than when someone takes a fabulous piece and revises it into a SUPER fabulous piece! I'm so proud of you! This is amazing! I love all the edits you made! Glad I could help! <3<3


    5 months ago
  • sunny.v

    “ with the word sorry dangling on his lips / like his cigarettes, glowing without shame” what a gritty, but still vivid line. it’s a very fresh piece to read, and delightfully raw! nice work! you said you’re new to poetry, so welcome!!


    5 months ago