rainandsonder

United States

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infp- 4w6- they/them

black lives matter & pride is over but the fight for lgbt+ rights is year round.

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Message to Readers

please consider commenting or reviewing if you liked this piece! it means a lot :)
i've been thinking lately about loss and memory and the significance that remembering something has to us and to our society, so that's my main inspiration for this piece. i'd love to hear your guys' thoughts on the subject!

on huckleberry trees & the violence of forgetting

May 17, 2020

FREE WRITING

23
i. there was once a tree in a storm, a huckleberry tree, and every day, the family that lived at the house whose yard it resided in would lift their child onto their shoulders so the child could pluck the huckleberries with chubby hands as adam reached to grasp the hand of god. now it is march, and that tree was felled in a storm, its body once an ancient and sturdy guard, now splintered on its side, now just a huckleberry tree that used to be and soon won't even have the wreckage to show for it. 

ii. when you aren't good with names and you aren't good with faces, there's no hope that you'll cross paths with anyone twice. sometimes as i crawl into bed far later at night than i should, i can almost see all the people i once met, but it's like trying to describe something on the edge of your vision without turning your head to bring it into focus. sometimes i leave them behind there and then, and when i wake up there's nobody with me, not even in my head, not even in my blood. 

iii. remember- a word like a cloud weighed down with rain. recently i image-searched a place i used to go when i was a kid and found that it was completely different from how i remembered. mainly, i had gotten the colors of the wall wrong. should you remember something like that? and if not, why does it feel so brutal to have forgotten? who am i hurting when i find that half my childhood memories are fabricated? 

iv. this is what i'm trying to say: everywhere in the world there are ghosts clutching pieces of you. there is something walking alongside you and there is something watching you as you sleep from the corner of your room. there are photo albums of things that you can't possibly remember, and there are people whose stories contradict yours. all the places that  i used to go are still there, right where they've always been, and there is a house with a huckleberry tree stump in front of it, proof that it once stood there. maybe the ache of forgetting comes not from losing what was, but losing what you made it in your head. 

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9 Comments
  • ★ white mountains ★

    this. this is incredibly powerful and it hit me right in the feels because I think about this a lot too...wow


    about 2 months ago
  • CrazyNinjaKid

    holyyy this is just on a new level of insanely beautiful!!!


    about 2 months ago
  • And_The_Stars_Laughed

    Wow -- this is incredible!! Your imagery and descriptions were so vivid and it all flowed together beautifully! I love the line "this is what i'm trying to say: everywhere in the world there are ghosts clutching pieces of you." It left me with this eerie yet alluring feeling -- I love this piece so much!


    about 2 months ago
  • Anne Blackwood

    What the heck how did you manage to do that


    about 2 months ago
  • Vinter Vejen

    woah, this is really beautiful


    about 2 months ago
  • rainandsonder

    @weirdo wow, that’s really nice to hear!
    @dmoral13 & @wicked! thanks so much!


    about 2 months ago
  • Dmoral

    your imagery here is amazing, i felt as though the piece completely absorbed me


    about 2 months ago
  • Wicked!

    That last sentence is so beautifully sad!


    about 2 months ago
  • weirdo

    i really expected this piece to hurt me in unimaginable ways but it just... ached which was shockingly beautiful. i loved the descriptions, although simple they really grabbed my attention. my favorite bit was “ sometimes i leave them behind there and then, and when i wake up there's nobody with me, not even in my head, not even in my blood”. it’s just so unsettling; i had to take a moment to blink. and that closing is excellent! i love how you started it; the narrator is completely aware of their audience and is trying to teach them a lesson of sorts. overall i just adored this piece. i feel like i haven’t read anything by you in a long while and seeing this on my dashboard made me smile


    about 2 months ago