Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
i adore your use of imagery and metaphor. you painted such a beautifully haunted picture in my mind, the turmoil and the torment of forever longing for something that you don't quite understand how to get is amazing.
no real confusion or anything i just wanted to know if it became a call to action a little at the end where it became more about social reform. i think it's a really cool connection! i loved how you portrayed the angst and then it became clear that it was also spite and anger at the world.
i love how you write and i think this is a great piece! i hope you continue writing because i think you'd go far