Peer Review by Century Friend (United States)

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Alloy (big news in message board!)

By: Anne Blackwood


FREE WRITING


I am bones.
Bones and skin draping over;
Synonyms and sallow.
Water is streaming out of the showerhead,
The one that tends to miss my small frame
And hit the shower curtain instead.

I am legs.
Legs and underarms unshaved;
Skinny and sluggish.
My limbs are too exhausted to drag themselves places,
And they do not understand
Why I cannot fly today.

I am hands.
Hands and feet reaching far;
Seismic and selective.
I keep trying to obtain something constant,
But this is ice and quicksand
Always falling away from me.

I am intestines.
Intestines and muscles twisting and aching;
Sickly and sore.
Noises are coming from my stomach unwillingly,
Protesting the state of my body
And the tangling of my art.

I am head.
Head and heart fighting;
Screams and sincere.
These pieces of me are the strongest and loudest,
They misunderstand and complicate
The things I try to define.

This is the finished product of my week five writing streak.

Message to Readers

Update (11/16/20): Hey, I'm considering entering this to the Scholastics. Feedback in the comments and/or reviews would be much appreciated!


Peer Review

Literally everything about it. But specifically, I do love the repetitive structure of the stanzas, and how nicely the poem comes together. I also love the title.


Aside from a few little things I wrote in the highlights, I can't think of anything!


Reviewer Comments

Good luck with Scholastics, this poem is amazing! Obviously, my suggestions are just suggestions and you're the author. Awesome job on this :)