Peer Review by DreamingButterfly (United States)

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The Night Sky

By: WhispersOfGray


FREE WRITING

The night sky is a vast city of diamonds,
littered with stars,
the full moon stands out,
a perfect, glowing circle,

There is a chill in the air,
one that is refreshing yet bites,
makes my cheeks go pink,
makes me zip up my jacket,

Nighttime isn't the best time for a stroll,
but who cares?
I need to freshen my mind,
find some comfort in nature,

An owl stares at me as it sits on a branch,
it's orange eyes unblinking,
I hear a rustles in the leaves,
as a snake slithers away,

I pause for a moment,
startled and frightened,
having caught a glimpse of its green scales,
shiny in the moonlight,

I resume walking,
the darkness swallowing the light behind me,
I feel slightly uneasy,
I should go back,

But I don't want to,
not yet,
I'm enjoying the silence,
although it is rather eerie,

I look up at the night sky and smile,
how I love those stars,
they've twinkled almost every night,
small lamps of light,

Soon, I head home,
feeling far better now,
peace fills me,
how I love being under the night sky.

 


Peer Review

I love the description of the sky in the beginning. It felt very magical and peaceful. I also love the general idea of the piece because I can totally relate.


I just love the ways you described the stars at the beginning and end of the poem and I wonder if you could incorporate that sort of thing into other parts of the poem as well. I would also like to know what causes you to go to nature for comfort? I don't know if you purposely left this out or not but I just think it might be an interesting thing to include in a revision.


Reviewer Comments

I love this poem so much! Keep writing because this is amazing!