watch how easy i can hook my smile behind your eyes +
gurgle brine between bites of oranges + beg for sunlight,
sunlight. skin turned gold with beginning, lips pink and flushed.
watch how easy you can hook your nails into my skin,
young and pale and soft as roses. salt water stings open wounds +
it’s my fault there’s only one part of me you like. i got undressed two inches away.
i awoke into your chest + begged for closeness, closeness
on sunday afternoons, i ain’t never seen blue like i did in that city,
swallowed up the sky. i’m praying your name.
tell me again you don’t know. tell me again how you’re doing
the best you can. i’ll listen, i’m praying, i’m watching the reflection of the
sky with you + now why are you so afraid to call me by my name?
i kissed a picasso once. we fucked in the museum bathroom,
made out with paintings, ran from security guards.
we were young + we were feverish + we were dizzy with belonging.
my skin is crawling away from my body + my tongue doesn’t
trust what i said + my mind doesn’t retain anything except
taste, taste, violation, taste, beauty. whose fault is that but mine?
i’ve never been happier. i was so close to god +
to beginning + to prayer + to maturity. watching the
mediterranean sea, all i begged for was pain.
tell me again what you would’ve done. maybe if
you whispered it real quiet + tightened your grip around my neck
reminded me of heaven + maybe then i’d have believed you.