Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
I like the organization of this peace into sections labeled with roman numerals. It really goes with the style. Here are some parts I really liked: "'go to hell,' luna hissed, dropping her cigarette onto the man’s shoe. 'and say hi to my dad while you’re at it.'" This indirectly characterizes Luna. I like the hissing too. "'don't you trust me?' he asked, freezing. his back was to her but she could sense his irritation as much as she tried to avoid collecting his emotions from him, she couldn't help it." Even though this could use a bit of rewording, I like how this shows there relationship without explicitly telling it. "'take this,' the man started, sliding something else across the table. only this time, it wasn't covered. it was a silver necklace with a compass pendant. 'it'll help you travel like you use to. but i should warn you, it's dark feary magic. something guardian angels vow to get rid of.' 'good thing i'm not one of them anymore,' luna said, snatching the item." Very solid ending, finishing the story and their relationship.
I know it's intentional, but I don't think the lowercase letters are working. My recommendation is to use capital letter rules as normal. Also, the title of this piece should be changed; currently, it seems to be the idea that inspired you to write this piece. When you feel you're done writing, when editing, make sure to pay close attention to the tense. Finally, in your next draft, you should show more and tell less. I know that's very vague, so here are some specific changes you could make: Try changing "only she couldn’t go back once she left, like many others do. and her powers were weakening the longer she strayed away from the very place she got them," and the next paragraph to some type of dialogue, or Luna thinking to herself. Change "he hadn’t quit, no, but had left due to the hand of the Goddess herself. the Goddess who claimed he was incapable of correctly helping a mortal, only able to cause their destruction. the Holy one was nicer, said he just made too many mistakes. nonetheless, both hurt him to a point of no return. his wings ended up turning ash grey and black too," to "He hadn't quit, no, but left when the Goddess claimed he was incapable of correctly helping a mortal, only able to cause their destruction. The Holy one didn't go so far - only said he made too many mistakes - but the between the Holy One and the Goddess, he had been hurt to the point that his wings turned ash grey, and black too." "because even a fallen faery would want to keep her wings." This is already implied, so it can just be removed. These changes are just suggestions.
All in all, a good idea, which can be developed more.