United States

est. 2018
she/her | junior
semi active; chaotic life.
published writer + classics enthusiast.

Message to Readers

don't overthink it. i really do mean everything i wrote in this piece though. growing up sucks and it's tough, here are some of the rough patches. but yeah. i was feelin' pretty nostalgic while writing this piece, but hey- can u blame me?

"i miss my cocoa butter kisses"

March 29, 2020



i ache for the days we use to play with chalk where the things we only wish to draw were the pretty things that flew across our dreams
then mama would call for us saying "hurry, while supper stills hot" and hitting us as we run inside while hushing "grow up"
but ten years go by and our fingertips are stained for reds and blues, leftover truths from what we've painted on the bricks on our streets
then mama hollers for us to come up screamin' "where you been?" waving her rag like it's got a bug in it and sighing "what are you doin?"

i miss the times when we made mistakes that were still considered okay because everyone our age is still learning with innocence in hand
where mama cries out with a hand on the heart "it'll be alright baby" and making unnecessary huffs and puffs then always adding "just don't do it next time"
but ten years go by and our tongue form the sharp word error whenever one thing goes wrong, because we're crawling in a world that's running
where mama bellows unspeakable phrases yelling things like "you dumb demons" and barely holding back sobs of "look what you've done".

i mourn for the days not knowing who we want to be was still funny since we kept choosing different things daily
so mama cheers on our dancing, singing "you'll be a star baby" and we knowing that night she'll mumble "they'll be doctors or something"
but ten years go by yet we can't figure out a future involving dinner and what we're eating all we know is we can't do nothing
so mama barks for us to start "getting our acts together" and we'll nod our heads with frowns as she grumbles "go on, be something great"
the title is a reference few of you will probably get, so here:  Chance The Rapper - Cocoa Butter Kisses 
"is about chance turning into a man who repulses his mother. he misses the day when he still had his innocence and his mother used to give him sweet kisses." ~genius lyrics
(if u got the reference, comment below & let me know bc we need to be friends)

For: Samina's contest, #Samina50, prompt 2.
lowercase intentional.
Finished: 3/27/2020


See History

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  • Wisp

    This piece is drenching in nostalgia and I’m living for it. I can’t speak for anyone else, but about 3/4 of the time I’m writing, it’s during the night when nostalgia hits in more ways than one. The vivid comparisons of before and after your mother is smiling at childhood innocence and lecturing you for adulthood maturity is just so real. I long for the days of youth to return where I could cover hands in pastel chalk colors and smear them on my clothes, only to have my mother scold me. You’ve presented longing here so beautifully and I adore your words (“They’re woven in my soul” just heard it on my radio, and I felt it fit since your words are woven into my soul) And that line, “sharp word error whenever one thing goes wrong, because we're crawling in a world that's running” it just hits so HARD. It’s so REAL IT HURTS. And I can’t convey how much this piece resonates with me.

    about 2 months ago
  • inanutshell

    omg i saw the title & got so excited... cocoa butter kisses is one of my fav chance songs! i also love this piece so much, especially love how it isn't just focused on the nostalgia of the past, the dual timelines incorporated here really makes this stand out more.

    6 months ago
  • Samina

    The results are out!

    6 months ago
  • mia_:)

    This is so beautiful!

    8 months ago
  • Carolina María

    I really enjoyed it, made me feel nostalgic yet melancholic in a way.

    8 months ago
  • Ursa

    not exactly writers block ... I have a few pieces in the works but I'm having trouble concluding them. I keep starting things and not knowing where I'm going, so they kinda crumble. I'm hoping to have something ready soon, though. thanks for asking :)

    8 months ago
  • Ursa

    well this hit in the feels :(

    why you always make me so sad dmoral

    8 months ago
  • Samina

    Thank you for participating.I got the links and checked also.Will update you soon...

    8 months ago