A Breath Into Silence

United States

Papermate gel pens and scotch-brite notebooks.

~Camp Nanowrimo Winner 2020~

INFP | 17 | she/them

Message to Readers

A sequel to "the woman in the white dress" that I definitely wasn't expecting to write. I meant to tell a story about another character entirely but oh well....

her blessings are also her curses

February 13, 2020


Raine buries her brother in the way of the Mer - she lets him out to sea. She has no boat to lay him in, no flowers to throw at his feet. She just lets him float on the waves, and the receding tide brings him out to sea. Each wave pulls her brother farther away, and Raine closes her eyes because it’s too much like losing him again.

Jack’s hair blends in with the water, and his old tattered white shirt looks like sea foam. He disappears before he has even left Raine’s line of sight.

And the ocean is pouring out of the cove, coming back again. And Raine sits on the beach, drowning in open air, begging the sea to take care of her brother’s body. She closes her eyes, tighter and tighter, until her blue pupils are hidden from the sun’s prying rays.

“I’m sorry,” the woman in the white dress says. The skirt of her dress has changed - now it is a waterfall of pearls and silk  spreading from her waist, and down to the surf under her feet. She presses her hand to Raine’s shoulder, like her steady presence will make everything better. It is a kind move for a fickle god, but Raine cannot see this woman as kind, not like before.

“I hate you,” Raine whispers, and her voice is sandy and rough even to her ears. She isn’t crying but her eyes are cloudy, a rainy sky about to break loose. Raine pushes the woman away and stares, sightless, out to sea.

“I am sorry,” the woman says again, because these are the only words that will come out of her lips. But there are thousands more on her tongue, heavy and lonely words. Her blessings are curses, and Mala knows it, knows that for every offer of protection she gives there must be a cost. How many people has it been, now? How many left, empty shells on lonely beaches, to hate her and turn away in pain and sorrow? 

“I am sorry,” Mala says, as if that makes everything better. And then she does what the sea does best - she pulls away, leaving the blue-haired girl to her grief.


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