Peer Review by L3X∅L∅TL (United States)

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i thought of dead things

By: asteria


FREE WRITING


i want to
SCREAM
for every ugly
thing you've
done.

but i know
your ears
cannot hear
that which is 
righteous. 

so choking,
retching,
the S 
        C
           R
               A
                   P
                       I
                           N
                               G
                                   of bone against bone,

you will taste your
worthlessness
like broken teeth.

 

~asteria

Message to Readers

dedicated to a friend

tell me what you think!
i know it's been quite a while, but i'm still kicking loves :)


Peer Review

The way 'scraping' is writen is amazing it shows the emphasis and contotation on the word. This piece to me is an intervention for a friend who maybe has their own problems and takes them out on you because you're the only one there for them. This is written while you're stewing, you-don't-mean -it -but- you- do kind of thing.


Is the 'dead' thing, your relationship with this person or maybe your respect.


Reviewer Comments

Nice piece and formatting, here, thanks for sharing.