Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
I, too, am angry about the slow progress about environmental activism and how corporations are not taking climate change seriously or urgently. I found the straightforward message "Instead, people are looking towards the youth to guide us, when they should be taking responsibility themselves." compelling because therein lies the problem of why Greta is not as effective in instigating action as she should be, and why people are not taking her seriously.
The "stakes" are not yet unclear, as highlighted in various highlights. Though we know our planet is at stake, the author has yet to highlight what are the consequences we face (food shortage? unliveable weather conditions? increased natural disasters? unsustainable living?) so readers might not identify with the urgency of the issue and might not understand how they will be affected and why.
Mostly I wanted to know more specific details about the problem, and how the problem should be solved.
You definitely care a lot about the topic, which is a great start because I can tell that you know what is going on and wherein lies the problem. All you need a little more editing, structuring and taking care not to bury your argument within the fact that nothing is being done.
This is one of the few essays I'm trying to review so it was refreshing to read about a topic I care about too! I think the title was very promising and sets up a compelling argument for why we should care about climate change. You have insights on the reasons why efforts are floundering but often did not go very in-depth on the reasons.
Your op-ed shows your own voice, which is great, and you also backed up your opinion. I think you can consider adding more personal anecdotes or stories about environmental efforts from your country to make your perspective more compelling – readers will understand what is your stake in the matter, and should they identify with you, they will see their stake in the matter too.
Perhaps it was because you didn't stick to addressing one specific audience throughout the piece and this confused you as you went on – you started off with the people who are relying on the efforts of the youth without doing anything, then moved on to corporations who are exceedingly selfish, then towards the youth who needs to take action but left out saying specifically how they could take responsibility. It diluted your message regarding who exactly is responsible, and towards the end, I was unsure of what was the message you were trying to convey. However, I did like the fact that you always circled back to the theme of responsibility! One suggestion for structuring your piece (though you don't have to follow this) would be that you could state at the start that we are all responsible, albeit in different ways, and then tried to persuade the reader how each type of people can take responsibility – politicians listening to the science, corporations focusing less on profits, youths being unashamed to make our voices heard, etc.
I felt that you were addressing mostly environmentalists and youths (though for the first half it was just the general public) and this affected the details you might have otherwise given – statistics, perhaps, about how dire the situation is, or a description of the world's climate situation. Details may add persuasiveness as they can show the seriousness of the matter, so don't be afraid to go into detail (though not for too long, else readers lose track of your argument). Perhaps you can look at other op-ed pieces on the environment and consider whether adding more detail would accentuate your argument.
I hope the feedback helped! :) Keep writing and I hope you inspire some action with your writing. Definitely keep reading environment op-ed pieces, or just op-ed pieces so you can glean some insight as to how to make your piece more persuasive. The fight for climate change is a difficult one, but I do believe in the power of words, so I hope we all keep at it in our own ways. :')