Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
This is definitely a piece charged and pulsating with emotion. It started off with disbelief, melted into anguish and realization that one cannot escape their human confines before drawing to a gentle and rather melancholic close where one realizes it's been a beautiful yet cruel mistake. It's almost as though I could hear the sigh of disappointment mixed with being awe-struck as you discover that the person in question was human. There are elements of questioning where and how your feelings for her could be so extraordinarily transcendental, and if I daresay, other-worldly.
Definitely how these two people met! And more importantly, more description of how the girl is like: her appearance, her little quirks and habits and your favourite memory of her, perhaps.
This is definitely a magnificent piece of writing. I definitely appreciated how you can turn such a well-explored theme as love and give such a lively take to it. Some of your adjectives add a dash of audacious flamboyance to the poem ("magenta soul", "moon-rock skull". )
It might be a good idea to clarify certain elements. E.g. the comparison between god and greed, though powerful, was a little confusing. Also, why "magenta" soul and "moon-rock" skull? What main idea are you trying to convey to your reader?
It is also a good idea to pay closer attention to some grammar errors (minor ones, already highlighted in your piece). Otherwise, it was definitely wonderful reading your work, and I hope to see more from you in the near future. Keep writing. :)