Peer Review by Suri Purefoy (United States of America)()

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Metal Heart

By: Jolenify


PROMPT: Open Prompt

Dear little heart
Hidden under steel
Too scared to feel
Hoping people don't draw near

Hard little heart
Love barely a slice
Cold as ice
Not one bit nice

Sad little heart
Barely living
People leaving
But still beating

There little heart
Can't cry now
Pain will grow
If you let them down
 


Peer Review

Check out this beautiful poem!


Your emotion that you put into this wonderful piece, connecting the reader even more.


I think it's great! The third line in the first stanza(
"...Hoping people don't draw near...") could use a tad bit of editing, but I love it either way!


Reviewer Comments

Hi there, Jolenify! I just want to say thank you for writing, and publishing, this beautiful piece of artwork. Keep sharing your talent! You're amazing!