Aurelia.Valus

United States

Most of my stories are based off of my dreams (weird right?)

School, sports, and work keep me busy so I don’t post a ton :(

Message to Readers

I would really appreciate if you took the time to comment/review this piece. Always love your feedback!

This is for @AcetheticallyPleasing‘s contest. Go check it out!!!

Midnight Encore #Wonderland

November 6, 2019

FREE WRITING

3
She looks to the sky. Hope and sorrow glisten in the moonlight of her silver eyes. They wander to those who have nothing. Who merely hang onto scraps of their forgotten lives. It’s all but a thought away. She can expunge the hunger and strife that plagued them day and night. She wants for nothing, her empty heart filled with meaningless tools made only for regret. 

She dances to the rhythm of her once beating heart. Her careless movements touch the earth, breaking it apart. Her delicate arms make the fluorescent flowers rise. The radiant sun shines as she hears the birds start to cry, and accepts it as her forsaken prize. 

Her song is a soft, sweet melody that soothes the air around. She loves those whom she cannot help. Enticing them into their vital sleep. Yet, her only wish is that she were singing a duet. Cool and crisp the air around her sings her songs to the heavens above. The chorus awakens their long slumbered souls. They look upon what great kingdoms she controls. 



My Lady, what will you do?
 
Ok, so I typed this in five minutes while listening to some DEEP instrumentals, which is always the best thing ever XD

Need some feedback though, anything I should fix, go into more detail with, etc.

Print

See History
1

Login or Signup to provide a comment.

5 Comments
  • Wisp

    The attention to detail in this piece is absolutely breath taking.
    "Hope and sorrow glisten in the moonlight of her silver eyes."
    "Enticing them into their vital sleep. Yet, her only wish is that she were singing a duet."
    It's so beautiful that I would even call this woman "My Lady" too.


    about 1 year ago
  • AcetheticallyPleasing

    I'm super super sorry for taking so long to comment on this! Honestly, I love the way that, in my head at least, it's detailed yet still abstract. I could definitely sense a wonderland within this piece, profound but still holding that whimsical nature of a daydream. Thanks for entering the contest! :D


    over 1 year ago
  • hi i'm jackson ;)

    thats incredible!!!


    almost 2 years ago
  • Aurelia.Valus

    @Bookworm101 Omg I feel that :D


    almost 2 years ago
  • Bookworm101

    ARRGHH I have no ideas for improvements. I have writers block, yippee. And it's NaNoWrimo season, too! Anyway, it's pretty good, so keep working on it.


    almost 2 years ago