Peer Review by L3X∅L∅TL (United States)

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Chapter - 2

By: suaurum


Link to the first Chapter:
Chapter - 1

Chapter - 2

Caspian hauled Aurum out of the pond with great difficulty. Heck, he thought, for someone so fragile looking, she sure weighs a lot. Suddenly, he lost his balance in the slippery mud around the pond and fell down with Aurum in his arms. He landed on top of her. Caspian groaned from the impact. His eyes landed on her face.

Aurum’s face was so peaceful. It almost felt as if she had wanted to die. For a moment, Caspian almost felt bad for trying to stop her from dying. No. He shook his head. He needed to remember his purpose.

He picked himself up and dusted his worn-out jeans. He positioned himself beside her. Kneeling down, he closed his eyes and raised his hand, right above her lifeless figure. Concentrating, he thought about her peaceful face and the feeling of being alive.

He felt his energy being drained out of his body as he tried to put life in Aurum’s dead body. The spell was strong but he had been practicing it. He was confident he could bring her back to life. But Aurum seemed to fight him. She didn’t want to live again.

Caspian growled in frustration. With increased concentration, he focused on his purpose and Aurum. Suddenly, he heard a sharp intake of breath. Caspian smiled to himself. Lowering his outstretched hand, he got up and made his way into the forest to gather some firewood. They would require it later.

His work was done.

He had brought Aurum back to life.

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Message to Readers

Please bear with me and encourage me. I would love to see all of you reading, commenting, reviewing and overall, liking my novel!!
Thank you!!

Peer Review

The piece is short but says so much, you're very talented, I say Aurum and Caspian, his struggle, her new shot at life.

Who is Caspian? What is Caspian? What is his job? Why Aurum? Are they going to camp out in the woods and talk? Debrief?

Reviewer Comments

Please keep writing despite of how others feel, if you love it, I'd hate for you to give it up, you have great ideas, people want to hear.